Is it normal to be 22 (about to be 23) and still a virgin?

So I've never really cared about loosing my virginity because well... I just haven't I guess. I was also focused on being a multi millionaire by 30 but the fucking Analyst/Associates in my group seem to give me lip about it every time. Somehow, even my MD is on my ass now about it. Note kids, never to talk about being a virgin with your co-workers, especially with dickheads in Finance. 

Anyways, how do I lose this shit to get em' off my ass? I guess what I'm asking is, how to fuck something fast? anything, don't care what it is. Just need to lose it, by the end of the week.

Comments (92)

  • Intern in IB - Gen
Aug 22, 2021 - 11:29pm

If you want to fuck a female, it can be female anything not necessarily a human if you're really worried about losing virginity fast.

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  • Analyst 2 in IB-M&A
Aug 22, 2021 - 11:54pm

I found it a waste of time and the chicks there never respond. Also, they want you to follow their instagram/tiktok or w.e, and I don't do social media so all around, I actually think I hate Tinder.

  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Aug 22, 2021 - 11:37pm

Don't stick your dick in crazy. Also don't fuck anyone at the office. I recommend watching enough porn that you know what to do.

You can tinder/go clubbing/go to the bar, and find someone fairly quickly to fuck, that being said, since it's your first time (and you don't have a gf or whatever), I might recommend an escort. Low drama and they can show you the ropes.

Also…you shouldn't have told your coworkers, but this is your decision to make. If you genuinely want to, go for it! Otherwise, ignore the noise.

  • Analyst 2 in IB-M&A
Aug 22, 2021 - 11:41pm

Escort? How can you tell if its a disguised cop and if she's clean or not?

Cop Fired For Exposing Policy Where Officers Have Sex With Prostitutes, Then Arrest Them. - Freeze!: southpark

  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Aug 22, 2021 - 11:49pm

There are services that are pretty professional from what I've heard (never used one myself lol). Those girls get tested regularly, and clients always use protection.

Risk of herpes is pretty high with anyone ngl. Also not gonna get accused of something by a hooker the night after/when her friends judge her.

Don't pick someone up in an alley.

Aug 23, 2021 - 12:10am
actual69, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Here's another guy being no better than the people at his job that are giving him shit about it. 

Providers will guaranteed be cleaner and safer than the girl he picks up easy his first time at the club there's no contention there. They are tested regularly unlike the easy lay at the bar. As the other user said there are lots of professional agencies and services out there it's not hard to find. Assuming he has some money, he can use a professional service and be safe on all fronts.

To OP: if you don't care enough for sex, then don't worry about it or what others say. There's no shame in abstaining if it's not bothering you. If you do care, then yes use a professional at least once who will show you how and what to do when you perform. It will save you a lot of effort and stress and most importantly you'll have an unforgettable time. Tell us how it goes, you got this king.

Aug 23, 2021 - 11:41pm
Attack_Chihuahua, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Watching pr0n is a bad idea for "learning what to do".  Bellesa House is the only exception but I recommend finding a good sex guide instead'. It's not that hard to be good at it  IF you read up on how to give head and what good fingering technique is. Beyond that it's just experimentation to figure out which angle, variety, and speed works best for the person you're with.

  • 3
Aug 24, 2021 - 2:50pm
Kevin25, what's your opinion? Comment below:

decided to check out Bellesa House - every second thumbnail is a guy licking pussy or kissing a girl. there's also one where a guy is literally kissing the girl's feet. fuck that shit.

Most Helpful
  • Associate 1 in RE - Comm
Aug 22, 2021 - 11:49pm

No homo. Is your dick big or small? If it's big this is what you do. Take your MDs phone and steal his wife's number. Send her a picture of your horse meat. This is going to make her wet for you immediately. Your going to need to get a room at a 5 star hotel. She will not go back to your shit analyst pad where you don't even have a bed frame. Be sure to watch a bunch of really aggressive porn before this. Take notes: slapping, stuffing fist in mouth. Real gross shit. Do big nasty with her all while filming it. Here is where things get fun. Send the video to your entire team and ask your MD who's the fucking pussy now. Everyone will immediately respect you more now that they know you push mad dong.

If your dick is small, your just a pussy and out of luck. Hope this helps!

  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Aug 22, 2021 - 11:52pm

You have no reason to lose your virginity my friend. Odds are you will have a less than great time, your coworkers won't change how they treat you, and you'll be left wishing you could have saved it for someone you actually liked. 

  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Aug 23, 2021 - 12:02am

Yeah I'm the guy that posted abt the escort, and I think this the best advice

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
Aug 23, 2021 - 3:09am

This is the correct answer. OP, if you truly feel empty over this, I would venture to say that the root cause is your lack of a romantic relationship of some sort, not the fact that you haven't had intercourse. Telling your coworkers that you lost your virginity to an escort may only exacerbate their treatment of you and intensify this feeling of emptiness.

  • 2
Aug 24, 2021 - 12:05pm
bb919, what's your opinion? Comment below:

this.. lost my virginity to a whale. still annoyed 

Aug 23, 2021 - 3:12am
cyberpunk, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Given the overall situation in the world, that is considered normal. The younger people in my gym also complain about being single for more than two years now. Even attractive girls at the gym were sitting around at home, doing nothing. they had no clubs, no bars, etc for a very long time.

But going forward, I'd just go out and enjoy life and meet someone organically. Hang out with friends and go out.

I am surprised that people in banking even talk about personal stuff, the people I met through a decade of my life are pure bankers - they really don't care about others or their lives.

  • Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
Aug 23, 2021 - 3:17am

22 and a virgin here as well. Same story as you in that I've simply never pursued relationships or actively tried to get laid. Faith ties into it for me personally as well, but the former is true too, practically speaking.

Do not succumb to peer pressure. In the future, refrain from revealing personal information like this to others. It is no one's business to know but your own. 

Aug 23, 2021 - 3:24am
AlwaysChasingTail, what's your opinion? Comment below:

I would start with curing your autism first. Who in the right mind tells their COWORKERS that they are a virgin? 

I'm from Europe 

  • 18
  • Intern in IB-M&A
Aug 23, 2021 - 8:04am

it's funny because I lost my virginity late. I was always good at socializing, loved going out, made out/danced with girls at raves and clubs etc but always felt uncomfortable at the idea of having sex with a random. Then in movies, forums, tv shows how virgins were made fun off made me feel really weird so I decided to just lose it for whatevs.

is it not normal? Yea honestly it isn't at our age but whatever. I'd say this, if you can't get sex and are trying then yea you gotta work on it. If you can but are more nonchalant about it (gotta be honest with yourself on this one) then it's totally fine. I ended up losing my v card to a legit 9/10 and it was the most underwhelming experience ever. I can't tell if im possibly asexual or men at large just talk up sex to feel cool around others.

Go out, get drunk, talk to everyone. Tinder is ok but don't expect anything crazy on it. I'd focus on the former really you can't expect to get laid if you're not in a setting to make it happen. Even just making friends with a couple girls can open up a ton of doors to meeting other girls.

  • Intern in IB-M&A
Aug 23, 2021 - 11:01am

Eh, if anything most dudes around me when I go out are the "soyboys" seeing how far they go just to get some avg pussy like buying every girl around them drinks and small talking cringy shit.

At the end of the day women approach me, buy me drinks, etc. I don't even go out with the intention of getting laid, just want to have a good time and socialize.

Maybe you can take note. 

Aug 24, 2021 - 12:08am
Attack_Chihuahua, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Sex is amazing, but somewhat less so if it's somebody you do not care about. In that case it's more "mutual masturbation" and not that great.

  • 1
Controversial
  • Associate 1 in PE - Other
Aug 23, 2021 - 9:43am

If I found out my analyst was a virgin, he would be immediately relegated to the bottom bucket

Edit - a lot of angry virgins on this site. Sad!

Aug 23, 2021 - 11:34am
Sequoia, what's your opinion? Comment below:

First of all as others have echoed, don't share this with your team. While it's not a bad thing to be a virgin, society is still changing quite slowly on this. For instance, >25% of guys aged 18-30 are virgins & a huge portion of obv Gen Z. In 10yrs given the trendline, I wouldn't be surprised to see this hover around 35-40%. Older generations are going to be more judgemental on this but your cohort (late end Millennials / Gen Z) are driving this change -- which means in the office (which is filled with older Millennials / Gen X / boomers) they have different societal expectations & are going to judge you for it. At the end if the day if you want to lose it, check out the suggestions other posters have offered but if you don't care then why do something that you'll regret later on...honestly there is no right or wrong answer here, just do what makes you feel like you'll have the least regrets on thinking back in 10yrs  

Btw you already did share this with your team so this will be your monikor. A helpful excercise is thinking about the decisions you have and fast-forwarding to the end result. In this case -- Even if you go out tonight & get laid, you'll still be getting roasted about this for a long, long time. The roasts will just change to "oh he lost it super late" or "wow we roasted him and made him go out and do it, he's so easily led into doing things" or "he's only been with 1 woman". Honestly if the culture is getting tough to deal with, consider moving banks. Trust me on this, I've seen kids getting pidgeon-holed into the 'meme' analyst / punchbag role and it is 0 fun. Eventually can even shape you start to see yourself in a negative manner. Best to go to a differnet firm and start fresh, or if you only have a little time left here (4mo<) ride it out & go elsewhere (and don't tell the new people for god-sakes). Only people you should be talking about with such deeply personal things is your family or your best friends (if you even want to)

Aug 24, 2021 - 12:13am
Attack_Chihuahua, what's your opinion? Comment below:

I would not volunteer it, but the only time I have seen it work was when the dude in question was unquestionably able to get laid as a good looking, popular kid with strong leadership instincts but chose not to because of his religious upbringing.  In his case everyone knew and nobody thought much about it.

  • 1
Aug 23, 2021 - 11:56am
therealgekko, what's your opinion? Comment below:

If it really matters to you, hire an escort. She'll be a 10/10 (which I can almost guarantee none of your team has ever been with) and tell them your situation, they'll teach you the ropes 

If you have some kind of societal qualms against it, go do it where it's legal like near Vegas. Upper class has used escorts / courtesans to take virginities & teach sex for centuries, in many societies / age cohorts it's been a rite of passage. As long as she's clean & you're avoiding legal trouble, go for it

That said, I wouldn't make a habit of it given how absurdly expensive is. Do it once (if you want) and then move on

  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
Aug 23, 2021 - 12:37pm

This is exactly what I suggested. If he has some money, I think two 1hr sessions with different providers will teach him the ropes and give that unforgettable experience. A shame so many are uninformed on the subject matter and resort to casting fear into these young guys.

Aug 23, 2021 - 12:36pm
Yankee Doodle, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Why would you want to be a normie? At this point, what you have achieved only mere mortals can dream of. You are on your way to becoming an ascetic. Learn to harness your energy and you elevate to the next plane of existence. You must resist all temptation as long as you can. When the time is right, you will know what to do.

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn

  • 2
  • Analyst 1 in IB - CB
Aug 23, 2021 - 12:57pm

Honestly not to be insensitive but in this day and age if you want to get laid you should really be able to make it happen. Dating apps are all you need. I recently moved to a new city and downloaded hinge and bumble, in the past 2 months have been going on a ton of dates, slept with several new women and ultimately found someone I could see myself going out with for a while. I particularly recommend hinge because the algorithm seems to be really good at showing you people who will actually match with you.

Aug 23, 2021 - 1:12pm
Isaiah_53_5 💎🙌💎🙌💎, what's your opinion? Comment below:
Analyst 2 in IB-M&A

So I've never really cared about loosing 

*losing

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Aug 23, 2021 - 2:36pm
PocketRockets_, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Honestly (and I hate to say this), but you deserve the lip. In what world would telling your coworkers that you don't get any ass be a good move? You should have just kept it to yourself. 

Aug 23, 2021 - 7:07pm
Legion42, what's your opinion? Comment below:

it's completely fine dude. when you find the one it will be worth it or just be patient until you find someone you really connect with especially for your first time. 

  • Associate 1 in HF - Other
Aug 23, 2021 - 10:15pm

It's fine not a big deal lol, but if you really want to lose it quick I guess the optimal solution is sex worker - a high end one. 

  • Managing Director in PE - Other
Aug 23, 2021 - 10:57pm

Hey OP don't worry about this. Many if not most finance guys are married to ugly ass women anyway. For all the bravado displayed, they end up with slobs with bad personalities to boot. Seen it enough now to consider it a real phenomena! 

Do your thing and get involved somewhere where folks may have commonality with you, whether that is volunteering, Reading,  running, kickball whatever! Anyone on your team giving you shit a loser, ignore them and hopefully move on to a better gig when the opportunity presents itself. 

  • Associate 1 in CorpFin
Aug 24, 2021 - 9:08am

Losing virginity at 22 is no simple case to solve OP. Escorts are a great time but I would recommend something organic for your first ever given your age. If you were 17 I'd say fuck the first thing you see.

By the tone of your post, I am assuming that you haven't penetrated yet not because you're completely ugly but you are non-sexual (which is fine, although it does explain your naivete of admitting to coworkers that you are a virgin but that damage is done). Do you even check out girl's asses on the street? 

Aug 24, 2021 - 3:02pm
Kevin25, what's your opinion? Comment below:

my advice: don't use prostitutes, they couldn't care less about you, they'll just take your money, do a couple of unenthusiastic motions and kick you out, and you might get even worse attitude towards sex. instead, download all the dating apps possible, lower your standards, and try to get sex until you get it. learn from your mistakes from the way girls respond and adapt. give it time, it may take several months, but at this point it shouldn't matter.

Aug 24, 2021 - 4:29pm
Engr2Bnkr, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Why do you care what normal is? Imagine your obituary saying you were a normal guy…

  •  
Aug 24, 2021 - 6:04pm
Robot., what's your opinion? Comment below:

No. It's not that big of a deal. Lose your virginity on your own time, who you want to with, and when you're ready. At 22 you'll be considered a little bit of a late bloomer but who cares.

Aug 24, 2021 - 11:46pm
DBisntaBB, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Keep your virginity man, it only gets more valuable as time goes on (see definition of SCARCITY). While you may be ridiculed by insecure idiots, you just need to own it - i.e., its not cool to be a virgin because you simply can't be laid, but it is incredibly based to be one because you are saving yourself for marriage. Some days I wish I wouldn't have been a man-hoe.

In addition, if you are interested in a religious girl, this is a huge selling point

Aug 25, 2021 - 12:13pm
REcumdumpster, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Bro wtf have you been doing for 22 years. You are sooooo focused on becoming a multi millionaire before 30 but have yet to engage in the most amazing wonders that cum free with life. Align your priorities dude. 

Aug 25, 2021 - 12:23pm
ConfusedGuru, what's your opinion? Comment below:

You act like it's so easy, and no, hookers and women you aren't attracted to don't count, just so you can bust a quick nut

  • Associate 1 in IB - Cov
Aug 26, 2021 - 1:01am

Same exact situation as you OP. Similar age to you and never kissed a girl or been on a date. No idea how to do it at this point so I've pretty much given up. Glad someone else brought it up and I'm not the only one though.

Feb 14, 2022 - 2:33am
i.can.make.it, what's your opinion? Comment below:

I've slept with lots of hot girls (by my barometer, made a post about it) and I'll rather be an associate rn, im 24. Would deffo rather be a virgin and an associate than where I am rn (An1 after 2 years in Big 4 audit)

  • Intern in IB - Cov
Aug 26, 2021 - 12:15pm

Similar spot, grew up really shy and kinda awkward through high school. Did the whole bulk up/gain confidence through college bit but didn't really focus on getting girls and as a guy you basically have to make the first moves or else it'll rarely happen. And then of course covid took away my last three semesters of proper college social life. 

Sep 1, 2021 - 4:41pm
MonkeyNoise, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Your mistake was somehow going through college and emerging without that experience. Never in your life will you be around so many people your age, who are willing to meet new people, likely single, with alcohol involved. But guess what - if you live in a city like NYC, Chicago, LA, etc. after college then you get another crack at this because it's basically an extension of college for another 10 years or so.

As a late bloomer myself (lost it at 20) I know what it's like to have everyone talk about scoring and having to go quiet, hopefully no one asks you to talk about your experiences. Even then I would lie outright, but I get confiding in your 'friends' however you have to know that people are a-holes and love putting someone under them so you wont shake that label unless, as others have said, you brand yourself as a christian goody two shoes (likely too late for that). 

You need to focus on getting experience with women ASAP though OP. Not even to shake this label at work, but because with the money you are expecting to earn over your life you will be absolutely EVISCERATED when you close in on 30 and are seen as a landing spot by some controlling woman. You need to go on as many dates as possible just for the experience. ACCEPT that things will be awkward, that you will fall on your face, get attached, get ghosted, all of it -but accept that you will learn and improve from it. Once you have been able to hook up with AT LEAST ~20 women or so, again very possible in your city and age, then you basically become somewhat of a pro on the subject

Fortunately you live in a dating app era, this has never been easier for an inexperienced introverted dude. Forget Tinder - that's for wal-mart cashiers looking for a baby daddy. Get an app like Hinge, hit the gym and start to get fit if you arent, try taking on a new challenging hobby like rock climbing or boating or whatever, - just something that you enjoy and looks cool with pics. It wont happen overnight but you should be able to be in a place to enter your late 20s as somewhat of a Casanova.

I know this post has been long but in all seriousness OP your window is closing. You got a second chance in your situation post college to rewrite how you view yourself and how others view you. Use these next 3 years to really build yourself in areas outside your career. If you enter 28, 29, 30, etc. in the same situation you are now then you are setting yourself up for a lonely, ostracized, and difficult life - regardless of net worth. 

  • 3
  • 1
Feb 13, 2022 - 6:57pm
Teller in Branch - Personal Loans, what's your opinion? Comment below:

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VP
Feb 14, 2022 - 2:37am
i.can.make.it, what's your opinion? Comment below:

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Feb 14, 2022 - 5:46am
neink, what's your opinion? Comment below:

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