Hooked up with the wrong person

Monkeys!

So I've been thinking about this for a while now and kinda wanted to get your opinion on this. I was a SA at a top BB last summer and wanted to go FT at EB(EVR, LAZ, PJT) so I didn't care about anything and ended up hooking up with an Associate from a different group. Turns out I didn't get into EB and received FT from my BB and now I am about to start this fall. I don't know how to handle the awkwardness especially after that Associate added me on LinkedIn 2 weeks ago. We are not in the same group but I think I'll be seeing him once we go back to the office.

PS. We both are guys and straight (at least I am) and I have a girlfriend and I don't know what to do about this whole situation.

Region: 
Global / All Content

Comments (151)

Most Helpful
  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

How are you straight if you hooked up with a dude?

    • 244
May 9, 2020

it was a happy hour and I was kinda drunk

    • 17
  • Associate 2 in Acct - Other
May 9, 2020

"I was drunk it doesn't count!"

Mate I've got some news for you...

    • 59
  • Executive Director in PE - Other
May 10, 2020

Mate I think most of us would have to be so drunk we'd have already passed out for that to happen. But hey, I respect the hustle and I'm sure you'll get the return offer. The hard way.

    • 3
  • Associate 2 in IB-M&A
May 15, 2020

May 9, 2020

Also, I did say "no homo" so I'm good

    • 119
    • 1
  • Associate 2 in CorpDev
May 9, 2020

Ah there we go! Problem solved, just tell your gf that she'll be fine

    • 5
May 9, 2020

i gotta leave this at 69 sb

    • 1
May 11, 2020

10/10, would read again

also, epic username

  • CEO in Other
May 15, 2020

oh no
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pTTMzJpofLg/maxresdefault.jpg

May 9, 2020

Someone took the advice to play the "LGBT+ card" a bit too seriously.

Appreciate the dedication and commitment, tho.

"If it is on WSO, it must be true" ~ old Jewish proverb.

    • 22
  • Prospect in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

I think we're all thinking it, but nobody has explicitly asked... I'm sure it was a new experience for you. I'm straight, and not homophobic, so I've certainly been curious:

What did it feel like when you tried to sit down the next morning?

    • 7
    • 1
  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

How many pillows did you need to sit on?

    • 2
May 12, 2020

gayyyyyyyy

May 9, 2020

sometimes straight guys just want to get POUNDED IN THE ASS, nothing gay about it

    • 12
  • Summer Associate in IB - Ind
May 9, 2020

Are you speaking from experience?

    • 4
May 14, 2020

even front office guys want to try out the back office every now and again

    • 4
May 10, 2020
Analyst 1 in IB-M&A:

How are you straight if you hooked up with a dude?

You've made my day!!!

May 9, 2020

wtf

    • 6
  • Prospect in IB - Gen
May 9, 2020

Dude it's more common than you think and just pretend nothing happened at least that's what HR told me

    • 42
    • 1
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

"at least that's what hr told me" wtf ahhahahah

    • 12
May 9, 2020

Did the same thing bro

Array

    • 6
May 9, 2020

I think the other guy should give you a silver banana.

    • 12
May 9, 2020

He kinda already did tho

    • 46
    • 1
May 9, 2020

tea

"Markets can stay irrational longer than you can stay solvent."

    • 3
May 9, 2020

its not gay if you have your socks on

seriously just be cool about it. You would not believe how many people have hooked up in your office/friend groups/social circles that you would never have guessed; people are good at covering things up. We've all made some questionable decisions while drunk - it's totally normal if you both pretend its normal. I've personally hooked up with 2 of my friends in my closest circle while drunk and hooked up with a professor at my college before I was accepted (never had class but ran into them at a social function) and nobody knows anything about anything

    • 9
May 9, 2020

I thought I can keep this a secret but he just added me on LinkedIn. He may like me so I hope he makes VP soon so I can milk him for better deals and promotion. Also, I'm pretty sure he had a sock on but I was too drunk to remember.

    • 16
May 9, 2020

honestly just don't worry about it - you're probably fine. If he does become VP, it will be good for your career. However, don't piss him off or offend him - that could be bad for your career. You can't change the past, just be chill about things now and don't worry too much.

May 9, 2020

I bet you could milk him real good now since you've had some practice

    • 18
  • Analyst 1 in CB
May 10, 2020

Wait, this is normal in IB? I guess you people weren't joking about the kneepads.

May 10, 2020

Get a kneepad for gardening - except this time, you're sucking seed and not planting it

    • 2
May 9, 2020

Curious how you explained that to your girl. Either way I think you should move on or tell your girl the truth. Especially if you're working together with him

    • 1
    • 1
May 9, 2020

I would advise against telling your girl - if you hooked up with a girl you're best to avoid telling her about it imo, with a guy its 10x worse because people still have terrible stigma against bisexuality (not saying you are) but there's still so many girls who think any guy who has hooked up with a guy are 100% gay and not straight. Most girls aren't cool with it, they think you're gay, and might want to break up. So be cautious and smart.

    • 7
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  • Analyst 1 in IB - Ind
May 9, 2020

for the first time EVER, you are dropping solid knowledge and wisdom while also mentioning getting fucked in the ass.

    • 10
May 9, 2020

Do NOT tell the girl!!

If it was nothing, and you're trying to minimize it, don't give it any air time. You aired enough here, got it off your chest, vented, DONE.

Over. Next. Accept the LinkedIn, be polite, in 2 minutes he'll know you have a girlfriend (who knows nothing), and it's history.

Do NOT tell her.

    • 2
    • 1
May 9, 2020

He literally said it in his note "excited for you to start ;)" in his LinkedIn request and I never cringed this hard

    • 11
May 9, 2020

"babe I always wondered how it is like to suck a dick so I tried it with this dude and it really liked it but don't worry no homo"

    • 4
May 9, 2020

I mean don't knock it til you try it lol

    • 2
May 10, 2020

phrasing

    • 1
    • 1
May 9, 2020

I am surprised by all the serious replies this has gotten

Gun rights activist
    • 6
  • Prospect in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

First I thought you are a dude hooked up with a female associate,..

Then read this sentence "I think I'll be seeing him once we go back to the office" I thought ohhh so you're a female intern...

And then this sentence "We both are guys and straight (at least I am)"...what the fuck lolololol

    • 42
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  • Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
May 9, 2020

It's high time that drunk office hook-ups included LGBTs. Jack accidentally banging Karen from compliance or whoever is so 20th century.

    • 12
May 9, 2020

"Accidentally"

    • 2
  • Prospect in AM - Equities
May 9, 2020

I'm 100% straight and sck dck because im comfortable with my sexuality

    • 9
    • 1
  • Summer Associate in IB - Ind
May 9, 2020

I'm so confused. I can't tell if people are joking here.

  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

actually am quite surprised and happy to see that most people aren't bashing him for being gay but are actually helping him out

    • 4
May 9, 2020

How embarrassing this comment is for you.

    • 4
    • 3
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 10, 2020
VP in IB - Gen:

Everyone makes mistakes, even faggots.

Does this help you hide your own insecurities?

    • 1
    • 2
  • Prospect in Other
May 9, 2020

it's 2020 boomer, no one cares if you're gay

    • 3
    • 1
May 10, 2020

cringe

Si vis pacem, para bellum

    • 2
  • Analyst 1 in IB - Ind
May 9, 2020

TEA SO HOT

    • 1
May 9, 2020
Mr.JoeBaskin:

PS. We both are guys and straight (at least I am) and I have a girlfriend and I don't know what to do about this whole situation.

They had us in the 1st half, not gonna lie

"They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin' smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby!" - Boiler Room

    • 6
  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
May 9, 2020

Look I'm sorry but if you're attracted to other men in the slightest and then acted on it, you must tell your girlfriend. What someone said earlier about girls not being cool with it is true, but you might be surprised. My situation is the reverse and it's always been better to be honest than have people find out from someone else (worst case).
P.S. straight people don't have sex with the same sex. They almost always stay in the top region lol. Might want to reconsider your definition of "straight"

    • 4
    • 1
May 12, 2020
Analyst 1 in IB - Gen:

P.S. straight people don't have sex with the same sex. They almost always stay in the top region lol. Might want to reconsider your definition of "straight"

Might want to upgrade your understanding of human sexuality to v.2020

    • 1
  • Summer Associate in IB - Ind
May 12, 2020

Straight people have gay sex in 2020?

  • Analyst 1 in S&T - Other
May 15, 2020

pathetic

May 9, 2020

You should endorse him on LinkedIn for persuasion, teamwork, and maybe time management

    • 35
May 9, 2020

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time...

May 9, 2020

Should you be posting here given how oddly specific your story is?

    • 8
May 9, 2020

The Associate said he "isn't active" on social media and WSO so I am hoping he doesn't see this. Also, I didn't mention which bank I was at, it could be either one- JPM, GS, or MS so I should be fine

    • 3
May 9, 2020

Did he also say he "isn't active" with straight men? Take it with a grain of salt.

    • 7
May 10, 2020

What if he's the active one recommending you to tell your gf so he can date you once you are single.

    • 2
May 10, 2020

this has become WSO's most followed post. OP may live to regret this fame.

    • 1
May 11, 2020

It's impossible to not opine on this one...who cares about GS vs. JPM, SA vs. FT, when this is posted

May 9, 2020

You can't sweat the past too much. Pretend it never happened.

That said, you have to come clean to the GF if you want that relationship to last.

May 10, 2020

I fail to see why he needs to come clean to his GF. Seems like that's the end of the relationship right then and there.

May 11, 2020

Soooo agree -

May 9, 2020

Cool supermarket novel bro.

    • 2
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

    • 1
  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
May 9, 2020

what in the whole fuck...between the story, the replies, everything. Not knocking you but in what world would you just hook up with a guy if you're straight. Also, is hooking up with dudes a normal thing (this thread kinda makes it seem that way)?? What is going on hahah

    • 1
Controversial
May 9, 2020

How do you think the non-targets manage to sneak their way into IB?

    • 12
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  • Research Analyst in HF - Event
May 10, 2020

lmfao salty nontargets throwing MS

    • 1
    • 1
May 10, 2020

lmfao

xx,

Twizzzz

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

It's not that it is common to hook up with dudes but this type of office hook ups happens all the time at most places. The funny thing about this post is the fact that it was between an intern(guy) and an Associate(guy) which also happens but no one knows/suppose to know about it.

    • 1
  • Prospect in IB - Gen
May 9, 2020

It's more common than you think. You never had an MD/VP ask you stay late night to "work" on a deal during your intern days ?

    • 1
  • VP in IB - Ind
May 9, 2020

Ah, so that's what "face time" means...

    • 2
May 11, 2020

It's as normal as hooking up with chicks if you play for that team (even if it's only part-time).

May 9, 2020

Soooo.... did you get the return offer?

    • 1
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

This sounds like every frat bro after a game day

  • Prospect in Other
May 9, 2020

someone's jealous they didn't get a decent bid

  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

Yeah man NYU has such a big frat presence on campus

    • 2
  • Prospect in 
May 9, 2020

For all the gays out there in banking.

Do you guys use Grindr to sleep with guys in other divisions of the banks? and do you not find it awkward if one blocks you and you have to work with them?

does the app even work in most offices? Would you advise against using it? it is like the only way I meet people because I am not out

are the LGBT network just another way to meet many peeps and sleep around like in uni.

Also an incoming intern, how do i strike a balance between making a max out of grindr and doing good work.

TBH sex is kinda my drug. so do analyst work so much that they dont have a regular sex life?

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

Yes, they do! you might wanna change your career at this point.

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

Also, this isn't necessarily a serious gay Q&A. Everyone is just having fun at the kids' expense and joking. If you have serious questions about gay hookups at your bank you might wanna start a new thread or discuss with your ERG.

  • Prospect in 
May 9, 2020

what is ERG?

May 9, 2020

Sounds like Brokeback Mountain.

Array

    • 2
May 9, 2020
Mr.JoeBaskin:

PS. We both are guys and straight (at least I am) and I have a girlfriend and I don't know what to do about this whole situation.

That hilarious af. It's time to go see a doctor my friend.

Array

    • 1
May 9, 2020

Dude, I sucked my cousin's dick when I was younger. No big deal. We're as normal as can be, don't even talk about it during the holidays.

    • 1
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  • Prospect in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020
BBCinIB:

We're as normal as can be

Yeah I'm not sure about that chief.

    • 5
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 10, 2020

wtf same

guess it was just pre-teenage hormones and exploring sexuality

    • 1
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 10, 2020
BBCinIB:

Dude, I sucked my cousin's dick when I was younger. No big deal. We're as normal as can be, don't even talk about it during the holidays.

Yo wtf is happening to this website? I can no longer tell the blurred line between sarcasm and reality... We really are in a recession lol

    • 8
  • VP in PE - LBOs
May 9, 2020

Reminds me of something funny that happened to me once

f

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

Sounds like you had pretty good time man

  • Associate 1 in IB - Ind
May 9, 2020

Would you say he used your face as a target? or was it more of a non-target

    • 3
  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
May 9, 2020

His face prolly looked like a glazed donut if that Associate did a good job!

May 10, 2020

hahahah.
For a moment i was like wow, he managed to bang female associate as an intern, that's some strong game.
Nice troll though

  • Associate 2 in CorpDev
May 10, 2020

OP now that you've succeeded with a lowly associate you're ready to up your game and try it with the MDs! Good luck

    • 1
May 10, 2020

They had us in the first half, not gonna lie.

    • 1
May 10, 2020

    • 9
  • Prospect in IB-M&A
May 10, 2020

So...you're a bitch ?

    • 1
  • Intern in IB-M&A
May 10, 2020

Yeah dude, both of you most certainly are not "straight". No one accidentally hooks up with a dude themselves unless there is some underlying homosexuality within. Straight up.

I suggest you seek professional help because you are bi at best which is no problem, I just think you need a real outlet other than WSO. This is me being honest, and being from LA so I have seen your kind a lot. It's doing you, your gf, your family, and friends no good if you are deep in the closet and think that this situation is normal. What you did is not heterosexual behavior. Please seek the right outlet and I can 100% say WSO is not it.

However, I'm 85% convinced this is a troll attempt, so job incredibly well done here.

    • 2
May 10, 2020

he took the bro hug way too far

May 10, 2020

So I was reading this an was like "well if this person added oyu, probably not a big deal... plus this happens somewhat often, c'est la vie, you'll be fine."

Then you hit us with the "P.S." and I am LOSING it

If this is real, buddy you got more important life stuff to figure out than just a workplace hookup. Good luck with your can of worms.

    • 1
May 10, 2020

deuce bigalow
i read this and all I can think of is Deuce Bigelow. Not sure why.

  • CEO in Other
May 10, 2020

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/JoyfulLittleAfricangroundhornbill-size_restricted.gif

  • Associate 1 in IB - Gen
May 10, 2020
    • 2
May 11, 2020

Here's a new thread for you to follow OP: https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/gay-lifesty...
Good luck!

  • Analyst 1 in RE - Comm
May 11, 2020

How's your girlfriend these days?

May 11, 2020

I hadn't visited WSO in ages (a little too old, first made my username over a decade ago).

I missed this kind of trolling.

    • 1
  • Intern in PropTrad
May 11, 2020

Who did you mean to hook-up with?

May 12, 2020

I just realized something. you did this last summer and are posting about it...9 months later? I have several questions

  1. what did you end up telling your girlfriend, if anything
  2. has this proven to be a one time thing or did you enjoy it so much you've gone back to the well
  3. who was top (v important)

if this is a troll, 10/10.

if this is not a troll, don't sweat it. I had 2 friends mess around with the same sex in/after college after having exclusively hetero relationships. one is back to being hetero (after a weird marriage to the same sex) and the other now has a higher same sex body count (likely was gay all along). both are happy, so I guess what I'm saying is, whatever makes you happy, do it.

    • 2
May 15, 2020
thebrofessor:

one is back to being hetero (after a weird marriage to the same sex)

You can't hit us with that and not gives us a backstory

    • 1
May 15, 2020

details are such that it'd give me away. the theory among our friend group was it was a weird phase but she was never really gay. who knows man

May 12, 2020

Wtf am I reading

May 12, 2020

I'm legit crying.... I'm straight I just accidentally suck dudes dick when I drink

May 13, 2020

is the BB UBS?

May 13, 2020

Yo WTF is that PS fam? HAHAHAHA

May 13, 2020

Well this certainly changes how I will read future posts regarding BB....
Jokes aside if your seriously seeking guidance I would consider all the work it took to get to this opportunity, and try to move pass it. If you both really are attracted to women and somehow really just made mistakes then it shouldn't really matter. Hopefully he is as concerned about this as you are about it. I would absolutely address the subject before your working together to make sure your on the same page. If he isn't on the same page that doesn't make him a sexual predator you just have to tell him where you stand.

If your on the fence that certainly will thicken the plot, but regardless avoidance isn't going to make this go away., If your that worried have a couple of drinks before you make the call to discuss, apparently that really helps you relax....j/k..... There's no section in the U4 to report bicurious encounters, so keep it professional and carry on.

    • 1
May 13, 2020

bruh

May 13, 2020

Do you think the hours and conditions of the investment banking internship turned you prison gay?

    • 1
May 13, 2020

Likely just bad math, overestimated the the FV of his BJ.

    • 1
May 14, 2020
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May 15, 2020
May 20, 2020