Your Life Crisis At 25 - I think quite a few members on this site are going through this now
Are you in a rut? Is it time to take life into your own hands? Are you ready take a time out to find yourself, and start over?
Are you 25?
It may be your quarter-life crisis knocking, say psychologists studying the phenomenon of 25–35-year-olds having a come-to-Jesus about where they’re going in life after having barely left the starting gates. Given the ambitious list of life to-dos many not-yet-disillusioned people give themselves (build killer start-up, and nab the corner office, and travel the world, and have kids, and be faithful to childhood dreams), it’s probably not too surprising that the phenomenon seems to be widespread among a certain class of people. Let’s come right out and say that like affluenza, this is not likely to be a problem outside the wealthier parts of the world.
In a study presented at the British Psychological Society meeting this week, researchers distilled the five key phases of the quarter-life crisis (via New Scientist) from a survey of 50 volunteers who’d had them:
Phase 1 – A feeling of being trapped by your life choices. Feeling as though you are living your life on autopilot.
Phase 2 – A rising sense of “I’ve got to get out” and the feeling that you can change your life.
Phase 3 – Quitting the job or relationship or whatever else is making you feel trapped and embarking on a “time out” period where you try out new experiences to find out who you want to be.
Phase 4 – Rebuilding your life.
Phase 5 – Developing new commitments more attuned to your interests and aspirations.
Having a quarter-life crisis may be a good thing: 80% of the respondents said that the experience turned out to be positive. And having your crisis early might keep you from having one when you turn fifty, after the rift between what you always wanted to do (be a chef! Write a novel!) and what you wound up doing (tax law! Wealth management!) has grown far vaster, researchers suggest. More studies are certainly in order, even if we have to wait 25 years for a progress report.
Are you at risk for a quarter-life crisis? The researchers say that idealists who also want to achieve conventional success—marriage, children, corner office—seem to be the population most affected. So examine thyself. Is a crisis in order?
Source: http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/discoblog/2011/0...






totally goin through a
totally goin through a quarter life crisis, not gonna lie. only difference is, as opposed to most monkeys saying "do i wanna keep doin this?" for me its "do i wanna keep trying to get started with this?" considering i cant find something. Like every1 else, i choose the road i did because of money, prestige, etc. However, unlike the older monkey who got everything he set out to get and realized it didnt make him nearly as happy as he had hoped, here i am already realizing it wont make me as happy as i will hope. Its all about finding something that truly makes you happy and the fact that in all these years i havent been able to is driving me fukin crazyyyyyy. im drunk btw, hopefully that made sense
GBS
GoldmanBallSachs: totally
totally goin through a quarter life crisis, not gonna lie. only difference is, as opposed to most monkeys saying "do i wanna keep doin this?" for me its "do i wanna keep trying to get started with this?" considering i cant find something. Like every1 else, i choose the road i did because of money, prestige, etc. However, unlike the older monkey who got everything he set out to get and realized it didnt make him nearly as happy as he had hoped, here i am already realizing it wont make me as happy as i will hope. Its all about finding something that truly makes you happy and the fact that in all these years i havent been able to is driving me fukin crazyyyyyy. im drunk btw, hopefully that made sense
Same here. I'm having trouble getting started. Not sweating it though. I also have doubts that this career would make me happy but I feel it's too late for me to go back and become a physics major and become an astronomer.
:P
I'm hesitant about a career that has regular 60-80 hour weeks (I'm aiming for ER). I still have lots to think about. But I at least want to try it out for that part of me that is interested in investing. Just in case my plan B is to become a firefighter. It does have 24/48 hour shifts or whatever but hell, I think it's a pretty cool job and I get to stay in shape.
Lots of credit to the people here that can put in those kind of hours and keep sane.
Though I'm not 25 I do occasionally feel the quarter life crisis, I think it's more of a post college thing.
Maybe Tyler Durden said it
Maybe Tyler Durden said it best:
God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.
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It's not a crisis, it's just
It's not a crisis, it's just a time when you begin to realize what consequences choices you made earlier in life have.
I'm not sure if I'm having a
I'm not sure if I'm having a quarter life crisis, but I'm definitely having something similar. In the past year or two, I've came to the realization that everything I thought I wanted, is not exactly what I really want. I used to think that I just wanted a job that pays decent (by my standards, which is probably lower than a lot of you aspiring BSDs) and is interesting/enjoyable. But lately I've been thinking that working in a cubicle for 30+ years would be such a waste of a life. Especially since most jobs are not that interesting/enjoyable, and having to be somewhere from 8:00am to 5:00pm every weekday kinda blows. I'm starting to think that I had it all wrong, and that working hard to get somewhere so anticlimactic was such a waste of my college years. I'm starting to think that some of the "deadbeats" I've known had it right; and that the kids who've moved abroad and experienced another culture are the smart ones -- they're the ones using their limited time on this earth to have some cool experiences and build a life worth living. Or the people who've followed their passion (whether it be sports, art, or poker), even when it meant being broke and hungry for awhile (sometimes a long while). At the end of the day, I guess I just want to work for myself and travel. It'd be nice to make decent money too, but I'm less concerned about that and more interested in finding a way to live life on my own terms.
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GoldmanBallSachs: totally
totally goin through a quarter life crisis, not gonna lie. only difference is, as opposed to most monkeys saying "do i wanna keep doin this?" for me its "do i wanna keep trying to get started with this?" considering i cant find something. Like every1 else, i choose the road i did because of money, prestige, etc. However, unlike the older monkey who got everything he set out to get and realized it didnt make him nearly as happy as he had hoped, here i am already realizing it wont make me as happy as i will hope. Its all about finding something that truly makes you happy and the fact that in all these years i havent been able to is driving me fukin crazyyyyyy. im drunk btw, hopefully that made sense
Exactly how I feel. Here I am thinking, maybe I should just take a job in corp fin at a normal company, get a dog like I always wanted, find a girlfriend etc... it would surely make me happier.
But I need to try going for the money and prestige at least.
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Man, im no where near
Man, im no where near graduating and I have this feeling already. I don't know if I want to go into banking or something else, business development or something. But yea, I still have my masters to do so I have time to decide
holy shit are you guys
holy shit are you guys fucking bitches, give me your man card
Step1: work long hours in
Step1: work long hours in your cubicle job
Step2: make bank up until having your A-HA moment and quitting to start your own shit
Step3: ???????
Step4: PROFIT
I've come across this myself
I've come across this myself and have realized the truth of something my dad has always said "Don't worry about the money, it will come," I now see this. I have the money now....(analyst money) but it is not giving me what I thought I wanted and will never.
The MDs in my office aren't happy, they aren't depressed, but definitely look and speak as though they are defeated when we are one on one and not in a meeting or in front of everyone.
I want something to look forward to everyday, not just Fri/Sat night.
Finance is definitely the safest route. For taking the smallest risk, you get the smallest reward which comes in the form of good money but bad hours / work...not a great life. Take a big risk (start up, start your own, work in a field you are truly passionate about), you get the biggest reward - good money and good hours / work environment....good life.
econ: I'm not sure if I'm
I'm not sure if I'm having a quarter life crisis, but I'm definitely having something similar. In the past year or two, I've came to the realization that everything I thought I wanted, is not exactly what I really want. I used to think that I just wanted a job that pays decent (by my standards, which is probably lower than a lot of you aspiring BSDs) and is interesting/enjoyable. But lately I've been thinking that working in a cubicle for 30+ years would be such a waste of a life. Especially since most jobs are not that interesting/enjoyable, and having to be somewhere from 8:00am to 5:00pm every weekday kinda blows. I'm starting to think that I had it all wrong, and that working hard to get somewhere so anticlimactic was such a waste of my college years. I'm starting to think that some of the "deadbeats" I've known had it right; and that the kids who've moved abroad and experienced another culture are the smart ones -- they're the ones using their limited time on this earth to have some cool experiences and build a life worth living. Or the people who've followed their passion (whether it be sports, art, or poker), even when it meant being broke and hungry for awhile (sometimes a long while). At the end of the day, I guess I just want to work for myself and travel. It'd be nice to make decent money too, but I'm less concerned about that and more interested in finding a way to live life on my own terms.
Completely agree. When in college myself, I always found my good friends heading for a great summer abroad, while I was headed into the workforce. I suppose its kind of indoctrinated into you, go to college, work hard and make something of myself. But now, even the hiring managers look for some exciting experiences, ahead of your 4 year toil and hard work. I was lucky I caught onto that quickly. I always thought I wanted to be a laywer but 6 months in, I quit my associate gig. Since then I've worked in India, Israel, Germany, while travelling a little through Europe and South America. Its precisely one of the reasons I'm headed back to school. Those experiences cleared my head as to what I wanted to do and I'm so glad I turned my back on a office job to do what I want to do now. I turned 26 the other week and I still feel I have missed out on so many experiences (small but I've never been skiing in my life). I suppose the realization is the biggest step.
And I can always revert back to being a lawyer at any time.
I'm the target age for this
I'm the target age for this article and I often get these feelings. I have quite a few friends in social media or tech start-ups whose jobs sound fascinating, have great working hours and get perks galore. Their base salaries are also finance base. While I still believe that industry is in tech bubble 2.0, it sounds like an incredible scene to be a part of while it lasts. If I wasn't doing what I do now, I'd be doing that...
That said, I think finance is definitely still the right track for me, for now. I make far more than both my parents combined ever earned and I get to live in another country. I see these years as an investment in the future - may as well work 80 hour weeks and work hard/play hard while I can before it's not possible anymore.
A lot of my friends from college are still waiting tables and living at home and living on debt. Yeah their hours are fantastic, but they have no money to do anything in that time, except maybe a month travelling a year. Their CVs look terrible and their work ethic has been eroded.
Never had this feeling.
Never had this feeling. Don't let other people convince you that you should be "doing more with your life." If you like what you're doing or think it's what makes the most sense for you then it's what you've decided is right at the moment. Everyone my age who I meet for the first time that isn't in finance somewhere always tries to get me to admit that I hate my job and I'm a slave to some evil greedy system that frankly doesn't exist. They just want to make themselves feel better about their menial existence at their online cat food delivery startup that grossed $16 last year because their grandma picked up a bag of Meow Mix.
Maybe finance isn't what you were cut out for - sure that's the case quite often - but don't let anyone convince you that there's some greater need for all people to "explore themselves" and go out and find something that has whatever the hell "societal value" is. Your job is no different than their job, is no different than anyone else's. They're all just jobs. Quitting to become a starving artist is not going to make your life more fulfilling, as exciting as it sounds when you read some "I quit banking look at how happy I am" thread on this site.
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FinancialNoviceII: I suppose
I suppose its kind of indoctrinated into you, go to college, work hard and make something of myself.
Yeah, I agree. I think a lot of people get the idea that if they work hard and go to college, a lot of other stuff will pan out. At the end of the day though, there's still a lot more to do, and following this path won't necessarily lead to happiness.
Don't let other people convince you that you should be "doing more with your life."
I totally agree with this. A lot of people think they need to be out there doing something altruistic and for the benefit of mankind. I say fuck that; do what makes you happy.
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A few things: (1) Firstly, I
"Your imagination is your preview of life's coming attractions."
--Albert Einstein
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duffmt6: MoneyTalksMonkeysW
"Your imagination is your preview of life's coming attractions."
--Albert Einstein
http://davincisdelta.wordpress.com/
Great post.Certainly
is it me or a person can
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go.with.the.flow: is it me or
"Your imagination is your preview of life's coming attractions."
--Albert Einstein
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the whole go travel do
Holy cow ! I don't understand
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go.with.the.flow: is it me or
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I went through this senior
tedrd.88: I went through this
Hahahahahahhaaha Sounds like
Several comments: (1)
It's not a crisis. It's
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I when I was young I used to
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I honestly think this is
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Power and Money do not change men; they only unmask them
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When I was young my family
I'll take a bag of Meow Mix.
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