How To Kill a Bank - The Final Chapter

Eddie Braverman's picture
Rank: The Pro | 21,129

Mod Note (Andy): Best of Eddie, this was originally posted in October 2010. To see all of our top content from the past, click here.

Many of you remember a series I wrote earlier in the year entitled How To Kill a Bank (here's Part 1 and Part 2). It was supposed to be a 3-part series, but the first two parts generated so much hate mail that I never bothered to post the final part. You guys have been asking about it ever since.

For those who don't remember, I created a 10-step plan that enabled consumers to destroy one of the four major commercial/investment banks (Bank of America, Citigroup, Wells Fargo, or JP Morgan Chase). I posted the actual plan on the site for about a half hour and then took it down because it got such a violent response. I was literally accused of economic terrorism.

Unbeknownst to me, the post got a lot of attention outside the site as well, and it wasn't long before I was contacted by Tim Schultz, a freelance writer in Tokyo, who convinced Playboy Magazine that it could be their financial story of the year. I'm pleased to present you with the end result, available on newsstands Friday, October 15:

It's been a surreal process guys, and Patrick and I really appreciate your patience. While I haven't seen the article itself yet, I'm confident the author did a great job and that it will be both entertaining and enlightening. My plan was presented to a wide range of experts (St. Louis Fed President James Bullard, former S&L regulator and current UMKC Economics and Law professor Bill Black, and others) and I'm anxious to read their input.

Not for nothing, but the November issue also boasts as cover girl MMA sweetheart Arianny Celeste and Playmate of the Month Shera Bechard(Safe for Work link). I have it on good authority that they might even be naked.

So get out there on Friday and pick up the November issue, or just go ahead and subscribe for a couple bucks more. I'm anxious to hear what you guys think.

By the way, 10 Silver Bananas to any monkey who submits a photo of himself (or herself) reading the November issue on their trading floor or any other readily identifiable area of their firm (you prospective monkeys can submit a photo of yourself with the magazine in a bank to qualify - extra banana if the photo includes a hot teller). You can cover your face with the magazine if you're worried about anonymity. Submit photos to [email protected]. We'll put together a monkey Wall of Shame.

Comments (48)

Oct 13, 2010

Wow, congrats Eddie! Hopefully the guy will mention WSO so the site can get some publicity.

"If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars." - J. Paul Getty

    • 1
Oct 13, 2010

Thanks! The article is actually about WSO, and the power that financial blogs like us have today. I'm pretty sure Patrick's in the article too.

    • 1
Oct 13, 2010

Congrats, well done EB!

    • 1
Oct 13, 2010

That's awesome Ed, congrats! Haven't picked up a playboy in a loooong time but I'll be getting this one for sure.

People like Coldplay and voted for the Nazis, you can't trust people Jeremy

Oct 13, 2010

Damn Ed...that's awesome, well worth the wait

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford

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Oct 13, 2010

Now I can really read Playboy for the articles!

Seriously though good work.

Oct 13, 2010

Win

  • vanillathunder12
  •  Oct 13, 2010

You should have held out for Megan Fox being on the cover. But other than that, it's pretty fucking cool to say "Yeah, I had one of my articles published...in Playboy!"

Oct 13, 2010
vanillathunder12:

You should have held out for Megan Fox being on the cover. But other than that, it's pretty fucking cool to say "Yeah, I had one of my articles published...in Playboy!"

That's actually been an area of confusion for the people who know about this. I didn't write the article, the article was written about me. As in, I'm the subject of the article. along with WSO (you guys) and the plan I wrote.

Just wanted to clear that up. Tim Schultz wrote the article (and had to spend some time in Paris's diviest bars to do it).

Oct 13, 2010

Congrats guys - should be some serious publicity for the site!

Oct 13, 2010

I would argue that being able to say there was an article ABOUT you in playboy is infinitely cooler than having an article you wrote in appear in Playboy.

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford

Oct 13, 2010

Wait......so you get accused of economic terrorism and are forced to take it down from the site....so you go and let it be published in an international magazine.... :/

I'm not disagreeing with you but what made you think it was a good idea?

I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing.

Oct 13, 2010
bulge4lyf:

Wait......so you get accused of economic terrorism and are forced to take it down from the site....so you go and let it be published in an international magazine.... :/

I'm not disagreeing with you but what made you think it was a good idea?

Playboy's legal department has much greater resources than WSO's.

Oct 13, 2010

Eddie, does this mean Schultz is going to reveal your real name!?

This feels like the episode of South Park where we finally see Kenny take his hood off.

"If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars." - J. Paul Getty

Oct 13, 2010
San Franciscan:

Eddie, does this mean Schultz is going to reveal your real name!?

This feels like the episode of South Park where we finally see Kenny take his hood off.

haha for sure.

Good job Ed.

Oct 26, 2013
San Franciscan:

Eddie, does this mean Schultz is going to reveal your real name!?

This feels like the episode of South Park where we finally see Kenny take his hood off.

Ha! Ha! When you do business with PB you need multiple pseudonyms.

"It's very easy to have too many goals and be overwhelmed by them... The trick is to find the one thing you can focus on that represents every other single thing you want in life." -- @"Edmundo Braverman"

Oct 13, 2010

Damn Eddie - well played sir. I apologize for giving you shit for holding out. As someone above me said "now I can actually read Playboy for the articles."

Having an piece about you in Playboy is an accomplishment - hopefully you kept all your clothes on, unlike many of the others featured in "articles". Can't wait to read it.

Oct 13, 2010

Congrats man, thats so awesome... just read the original posts now, interesting ideas.

Oct 13, 2010

Wow guys! I will go out and buy the issue when it hits newsstands.

Oct 13, 2010

Having worked on the retail side of JPM Chase, as well as currently working in commercial area of Wells Fargo this has definately peaked my interest. From experience and countless (useless) conference calls and "team meetings" I think JPM would still be a functioning entity out of the Big 4 Banks if a run was made on the community bank deposits. Their investment division had carried their profit line along with the mortgages until the most recent quarter when the retail bank actually posted a signifigant push in revenue lines.
At the same time if there was a run on WF I could be eligible for a severence package. . .

Oct 13, 2010

I'm counting on you guys to let me know what's in it, because it's going to be mid-next week at the earliest before I get a copy. It will probably take even longer for Patrick to get it in Buenos Aires.

So let us know if they make us look like asshats, lol.

Oct 13, 2010

Major props Eddie!

Oct 13, 2010

email me your address and I will overnight you an issue marine

[email protected]

Oct 13, 2010
monty09:

email me your address and I will overnight you an issue marine

[email protected]

Thanks, Gene. I've already got them on the way. You guys will still have it before me, though. I'll bet Patrick will take you up on the offer, though.

Oct 13, 2010
Edmundo Braverman:
monty09:

email me your address and I will overnight you an issue marine

[email protected]

Thanks, Gene. I've already got them on the way. You guys will still have it before me, though. I'll bet Patrick will take you up on the offer, though.

you have been on this site longer then me. I still tip my hat where credit it due. Thanks for all the posts over the years

Oct 13, 2010

Wow, all playboy readers in the world with this kind of information. This could be dangerous haha..

Oct 13, 2010

I was very curious to see what the plan was way back when. Congrats man.

Oct 13, 2010

yeah, thanks to all of you guys for making WSO such a great resource -- without it being a decent size when that story hit, I doubt Schultz would have ever come across it.

On another note, I think Eddie deserves a big congratulations (it is infinitely cooler that the story is basically about him and his plan) and all of the credit. I had one 2 hour interview, he had several FULL DAY interviews. It was definitely a fun ride to hear about it all unfold.

I will have some of my buddies up in the states read it to me so no need to overnight me a copy in BA...should be here about a week later. Hopefully this leads to many more stories about WSO so we can continue to grow the community (we're about to hit 40,000 registered members) into an even better resource.

Thanks again to Eddie and all the users on WSO,
Patrick

Oct 13, 2010

Gotta feel good to see your site coming into its own, Patrick, congrats.

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford

Oct 13, 2010

Tremendous credit where it is due - congrats Eddie and I look forward to checking this out in a couple days.

Oct 13, 2010

Can we not just scan the article and email it to you?

I'm talking about liquid. Rich enough to have your own jet. Rich enough not to waste time. Fifty, a hundred million dollars, buddy. A player. Or nothing.

Oct 13, 2010
bulge4lyf:

Can we not just scan the article and email it to you?

Copyright infringement aside, that would be pretty cool.

@SanFran WH Smith carries the American version here in Paris.

Oct 13, 2010

Eddie, what are the chances you could write an article about how the whole process came about, what went down, etc. Just curious as to what the day long interviews and such were like.

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford

Oct 13, 2010
happypantsmcgee:

Eddie, what are the chances you could write an article about how the whole process came about, what went down, etc. Just curious as to what the day long interviews and such were like.

I'm especially curious about who contacted you within thiry minutes of posting the article. Guys on this site? The feds 8| ? Congrats Eddie.

Oct 13, 2010

That is just brilliant. You have co article written about you in PLAYBOY. Can life get any better? Also good that wso finally gets good mainstream attention. Hopefully however this doesn't mean that the rite gets crowded with unfunny trolls. Although funny trolls could be helpful

Oct 13, 2010

congrats guys, awesome publicity for the site. well-deserved

Oct 13, 2010

gratz

Oct 14, 2010

F*cking baller, Ed! I honestly doubt any WSO member can top this in their lifetime.

I'll persuade my roommate to buy it and I'll snag it off him before he gets his jizz all over it.

I win here, I win there...

Oct 14, 2010

Luckily I've got a bookstore here which can get me the US version until Saturday. Congrats to this, really impressive.

Oct 14, 2010

Very cool...even I'll go ahead and get a copy...and give it to my BF once I'm done reading the article.

:-)

Oct 14, 2010

Very cool; even got a shout out from the NYT:

http://dealbook.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/10/14/could...

Oct 17, 2010

Eddie,

Read the article this morning. Nice one. I can see why you didn't reveal your identity.

While I agree that something drastic needs to happen for good changes to be made, I have to say I just don't think the plan would work. For me it comes down relying on regular people to execute the plan. See the link (http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2010/10/04/1010...) for an interesting article by Malcolm Gladwell that covers activism via the internet. While its not directly comparable, it makes some good points which I think relate to your tank-a-bank plan. What you would be doing is building a weak-connection network, which really isn't an instigator for change. Not trying to stir the pot, just offering another perspective.

Again, congrats to both you and patrick.

Oct 18, 2010

I just read the article.

I was surprised by the simplicity of the plan. I was expecting something much more complex. The plan was mainly working out logistics of a bank run, which now that I think about, would probably be the only way to go about doing this.

Also, that guy from U of Missouri pretty much outlined why the plan wouldn't work. When I read the plan, I got the sense it wouldn't work as well, only because there was such a large period of waiting from threat to action, and that would give more than enough time to the fbi/whoever to start tracing down who set up the website and arrest them. Also, there is the obvious problem of getting enough people to act.

But still, it was a pretty interesting read. Congrats again.

Oct 25, 2013

anyone ever submit any photos?

WSO's COO (Chief Operating Orangutan) | My Linkedin

Oct 26, 2013

Eddy, I didn't get a chance to read your original article but I'm guessing it has something to do with a massive collective withdrawal of capital from the banks. There was an incident that I read about in California where the citizens did that and tried to live off a local economy. They took their money out of the banks and tried growing their own food, in addition to not purchasing goods from any major corporations. They might of even tried printing their own currency, I'm not sure about that though. I can't remember where this exactly happened but I remember reading that the armed forces intervened and stopped their movement. Do you or any monkey's know what I'm talking about? I've tried searching for the story but I'm having trouble finding it now.

Oct 26, 2013
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