Critique my cold email template

I'm a freshman at a Canadian target school, trying to get an internship for the summer. As per a lot of the advice I see here, I'm gonna be going for search funds, small PE/VC shops and PWMs. Here is the cold email template that I will be using:


Hello Name,

I hope this email finds you well. My name is XXXX and I am a first year XXXX student at XXXX. I found your contact information through source and am reaching out to learn more about your career in Industry.

Recently I have been attending XXXX at XXXX, which so far has taught me some intriguing finance concepts and valuation techniques. I’ve developed an interest in analyzing companies, which prompted me to start forming my own investment ideas and exploring various careers in capital markets.

I am very eager to learn about your experiences at company, and your perspectives on the Industry industry. If you have any availability, would you be willing to call in the coming X weeks?

Best,

XXXX


Is there anything I can change to make this better?

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anso561, pure crickets, that's where I come in. Any of these useful?

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