Got forwarded the below from another analyst. Email has already made it through a bunch of BBs and MMs. Picture was originally embedded in the email body lol.
Sorry to borrow 2 minutes from you
Good morning xxx,
I'm xxx, a senior student from xxx. I was very impressed with your tremendous investment banking experience at Moelis & Company as a managing director. I also found out that you specialize in M&As, valuation, financial market and private equity.
Indeed, I believe working at Moelis & Company is an asset, and it will pay enormous dividends to every employee throughout the career. I’m extremely interested in doing an internship at Moelis & Company. As I believe I can more thoroughly convey my qualifications to you in person, I would like the opportunity for an interview. (Resume Attached)
Please let me know if I can be of any help to you! I would love to have a coffee/tea together if possible.
Best,
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I totally just checked this to make sure it wasn't my cold email circulating
Thank god
To be fair, if you had to check to make sure THAT wasn't your cold email, you should reconsider your own email.
Per dick_fluid's comment below, I definitely think it could happen to anyone. Personally, I sent a cover letter with the wrong elite boutique name when trying to get an internship back in college and have gotten called out by an MD for my cold email being too generic.
But I see you tryna roast me. I feel you. But what I will say is that Idaho is a big state. With a lot of potatoes. And a lot of potato cannons like the ones you can get in toy stores. All I'm saying is tread lightly.
i wrote totally legit cold mails and was still mocked at one place. (got an offer at another) the guys circulating this are a bunch of top notch assholes. can happen to anybody to send wrong mail.
Did you look at the picture? He used fucking hashtags.
Bet you haven't made a mistake in your entire life eh? Hope when you do, it gets circled around your workplace.
People don't mock you if you spend time working on your email template. It is very fucking hard to come off as socially awkward over an email. Forget the fact he is not a native English speaker for a minute. He's sending this half assed turd to MDs and can't be bothered to ask anyone around him for a quick check of grammar. Look at the picture for fuck's sake, the items aren't even aligned.
I've spent hours and had multiple people go over my email. I do so because I want them to be effective, I want to make strong first impressions and I especially don't want to ruin my reputation (which is critical in this biz).
+1. Good point.
Well that was a waste of time
This crosses my mind every time I get the cold shoulder.
i passed that stage without having my cold email on WSO.
Lol the $550MM Extraction deal happened last month not last year
Good lord. This is a terrible, terrible cold email. How can they even expect a response?
Can you explain how this is a horrible email? Is it because of that diagram?
It's cringeworthy starting with the second sentence forward. It's clear that he's not a native English speaker and doesn't realize how bad it is. The diagram... "my dream," "my skill," hashtags, three reasons why he wants to work at Moelis. Nice that he researched the company, but that was cringeworthy as well. Everything was.
I'm glad that his name and university was blocked out, though. He doesn't need that circulating.
///
If you use the info from this e-mail, you can find out that English probably isn't this guys first language, so you're right there.
But I'm going to go ahead and disagree on the "aesthetically pleasing" flow chart. I'm almost certain it was done in MS Paint.
Yeah the chart looks like absolute shit. You're in for a rough awakening in the industry as to what is expected formatting wise if that is considered aesthetically pleasing.
Maybe he was worried about going over the 2 minutes of time he stole.
Look at the alignment. Could have done it in PPT and aligned the text boxes to the center of the circles at the very least.
I get the fact that the attachment is terrible but like some have mentioned, English probably isn't his/her's first language. Also do you have anything better to do or laugh at then circulate an email or are your standards for what you find humorous that low?
I'm sure we have all done things in our lives that would probably make us cringe. Just my view but I would either A.) Ignore/delete the email or B.) Reach out to said individual and give him/her tips on etiquette and mention that the attached "resume" is not the proper way and give some advice.
Can you imagine his response if you replied? It would be another shit show.
"Good morning RedRage,
Thank you very very very much for your kind reply and kind words. I have much admiration for your great career successes. I have a big dream to work at Moelis. As I said initially, working at Moelis will pay enormous dividends for all employees throughout my career.
I am good in #Debt Replacement Model #DCF #LBO and much more. What deals are you working on at the moment?
Awaiting your good news and interview! I am available at any time.
Best,
xxx"
Guarantee he's on here.
Send to DealBreaker, please.
Here's a kid who started of really well in life and was highly motivated compared to his peers. Somewhere along the line, he realised this.....now we are here
besides the cringe worthy attachment
i'm curious, do you guys think is there anything wrong with the actual body of the cold email? seems a bit too forward for me
Yes. Quality of English aside, giving him/her a pass on that as obviously not first language.
Thanks!
On the "it will pay enormous dividends to every employee throughout their career" - I interpreted it as he/she meaning that working at Moelis would pay enormous dividends to his/her career, not the employees. Guess it just goes to show badly written this is.
pretty obvious he was saying working at the firm pays enormous dividends to all employees (just awkward wording and bad grammar and shouldn't have been written like that). clearly he should have had somebody review this for him and reviewed it better himself, but I'm failing to see how this email is really that bad, he's trying...
his grammar and word choice in most of his sentences are awkward and pretty bad though, but he's trying
You can tell that English is not this persons first language...as ridiculous as this email may be, cut some slack to the kid who is putting his/her foot forward.
Would agree. But he or she should've had someone proofread it. We're not all assholes that we wouldn't take the 5 minutes to look over something like this - everyone posting in here read it.
May just be my own experience, but it is much easier to correctly word an email and sense check the grammar than it is to converse in that language fluently. If the sender struggled to put this together, I can only imagine what an informational interview would involve communication wise.
As said though, poor form to distribute it, poor form to post it here.
Obviously an international student. I've seen worse writing from a non-native English speaker, but the image is what puts this over the edge. People don't want to read that crap.
Yup, the problem isn't with the grammatical errors. It's the terrible image, riding the MD's cock, and straight up asking for an interview that are the biggest issues.
The guy could've sent the email with impeccable grammar and it still would've been a shitty cold email.
Probably this person just want to stand out from the others that also send out cold emails
You're right in terms of wanting to stand out, but that's a big part of what makes it so bad.
that Moelis md is such a dick... why cripple the guy's finance career over such a trivial email. speaks volumes about the firm's culture...
Hmm ... it may work to differentiate himself from other emails. Also, whenever I get an email, regardless of how tacky it is, I like giving the student a chance. We were all his age at one point of our lives a bit naive.
Tough to read through...
Still poor form to be passing it around though.
The email is pretty bad and the chart is terrible but I find it interesting that an MD would be petty enough to mock/forward along this email. It takes a lot of interpersonal skills to get to that level, usually they would be above this sort of thing.
I have seen the original email - it wasn't to an MD, it was to an associate. The sender messed up that portion of the email.
That makes more sense, Associates and Analysts can be mean.
Who starts an e-mail with "sorry"?
"hahahaha look at this kid trying to better his life and get ahead and trying to reach out to people for help! hahahahah what a pathetic loser right guys?"
The people laughing at this kid are truly human scum.
I think you're missing the point. Nobody is laughing at him for cold e-mailing someone, people are laughing at him because of the content of the e-mail.
Are you talking about the people on this forum or the people sending it around? I think there's a big difference.
Props to the kid to hitting the pavement and sending out cold emails. I'll give anyone props for trying to network, but if you want to go beyond the standard cold email, then you need to maintain professionalism and execute it well.
Beyond that, no one on here knows who the kid is (except maybe OP?), doesn't have control over his hiring, and isn't circulating the email in an attempt to blackball him from interviews.
I personally hope this kid lands a job in IB, and I don't think there's any personal ill-will on here.
Kid seems pretty smart gauging from the technicals he listed... he will learn. As for the analysts/associates or MDs who forwarded it.... bunch of scum. The original recipient should have simply deleted the email or even called the kid and give him constructive criticism.
As I have personally found out karma has a way of coming back whether good or bad it doesn't have a deadline.
Thats a nice thought. Unfortunately Junior year SA recruiting does have a deadline. A very short deadline.
Plenty of other ways to break in..been done before and will continue. Now if the kid doesn't not learn from mistakes or tries to improve thats his fault. Hopefully he reads this thread, realizes that he fucked up and tries to fix the issue.
For some reason analysts/associates with those I know have a tendency to be assholes. Now if they had a chuckle or tapped their colleague on the shoulder to read the email ......fuck it thats fine....but sending it out to other banks to simply say look how stupid this email is..its another things.
(On a side note) Funny karma story co worker thought he was always a hotshot treated others like shit (IT, maintenance, etc), thought he could bring in any chick, in general a complete asshole. Found out from a close friend who works at a bar we frequent, dude was hitting on she-male had no idea and apparently left with her/him. Like I said no deadline...
English is not my first language as well but I did not think his english was that bad. I've seen way worse throughout my graduation. Could you guys elaborare more what were his biggest mistakes regarding the proper user of grammar or template?
.
plain & simple: this would not be a WSO thread were it not for the attachment with hashtags.
second language grammar mistakes can be forgiven, coming off as try-hard can be ignored, even having "MD" when you mean associate probably just causes your email to get deleted rather than passed around, but the attachment is the nail in the coffin.
stop being so fucking hyper sensitive.
/discussion
The attachment is what does it here. I personally would not have forwarded it (I might have had someone come over and look at the kooky email), but this particular email is so annoying it's funny.
Look guys, I know you're trying to land a job, but sometimes there's a fine line between cold emails and spam. The bridge I crossed from a non-target into S&T didn't involve sending unsolicited emails, but I'm not trying to close anybody else's bridge. Still, try and be couthe. Do your research, send a nice note, try and find a connection.
You have to understand that we are human like everyone else. Some humans don't like unsolicited rain. Some don't like unsolicited phone calls saying you've won a free vacation. But some do. Others don't like unsolicited emails offering CH3AP VIAGR@. But some also do. Others don't like unsolicited cold calls or cold emails. It doesn't make them a misanthrope, just like hanging up on AMVETS doesn't make you a bad person (even though the people calling from AMVETS probably disagree)
Finally these embarrassing sell side emails are nothing new. When I was an intern, we had Lucy Gao (who is now doing fine and a VP, I believe. Interesting lead idea: maybe this cold emailer can forge a personal connection with her via a cold email...). This kid will live and learn, just like Lucy Gao.
He said, referencing the job his father got him, after 8 years of sub-par high school and college performance.
Look, some people focus on getting a job through cold calling; some people focus on getting a job by being a good value in a commoditized product. I don't think there's anything wrong with working your butt off to create more value for your future employer, nor is there anything wrong with cold emailing people.
Have a good one, and best of luck pursuing this strategy, but I'm not sure your current attitude is going to help. For the record I do sometimes respond to cold emails, but I get like five of them a day.
Couldn't agree with you more brother, I look forward to all of my cheap viagra emails. That shady stuff from mexico isn't cutting it...only god knows what's in it
I'm thinking of sending out zany emails with a cartoon of me in my clunker and seeing if I can set up a PWM business on the side. I promise will take better care of these peoples' money than THABO MBEKI, BARRISTER from NIGERIA.
Cold Email Level : AZN
hahahaha
what the phuck is with all these asian kids that are desperate to do investment banking and have a common sense level of 0
MD in the Houston office of Meolis one of the best guys I have ever met. Not sure how many they have but 99% sure if him, he would not do this.
Meolis? Really? This is worse than the #finance #debt the kid put up on this email. Dude come the fuck on
No, Meolis is this new boutique bank that originates deals from CEOs who mistype "Moelis" and reach out to them instead
It's brilliant
Well at least I am not the one who calls out people's typos on forums. Also, 99% sure I could kick your ass IRL now. (I am the guy who does that though!)
"Incoming 2-hour investment banking interview Candidate at Meolis & Company"
Has a nifty chime to it. I threw it up on my Linkedin.
Dude could be a damn ratard, you sickos
this guy is an example of someone who would add MS paint slides to a pitchbook lmao
Another thing I don't like about this is that it's fairly easy to look up who exactly this guy is. Poor guy getting roasted for trying to get into IBD, albeit a pretty poor attempt.
Yea, it was way too easy to find out who this guy is. I understand the email was funny, but to send it around, especially with the attachment, is pretty shitty. All it takes is a simple linkedin search and this dude pops up.
I found the kid on LinkedIn. He is from China. Graduated with a 3.7 GPA from a private semi-target school with a top undergraduate business school and has hard technical computer skills. Also had respectable finance research assistant experience at his school, and leadership/extracurricular activities that shows he cares. One bullshit (but still something) internship during the SA recruiting period.. I don't know how the kid couldn't have landed in an internship program at a firm that extends full time offers. As you can see by the email, the kid must be odd and awkward as shit and that is why he struck out. Hope he finds something.
Man, posting this is some serious douchey shit. Poor kid will probably see this. Really wish the person he emailed would've just gotten back to him and just critiqued his approach instead of being a chache and spreading it around.
edit: lol getting MS for speaking my mind on this, but not getting any responses why other than
"HURR DURR WSO TOO SOFT NEED TO MAKE FUN OF KIDS TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER ABOUT BEING A WASHED UP TOOL FRAT BRO"
Please MS OP, the dick.
It's all fun and games until his asian business tycoon daddy starts sponsoring defamation suits
Further blinded the image to appease the masses.
WSO has really gotten soft.
Maybe I am being naive or whatever, but how exactly is a cold email supposed to go then? Some comments above hit it, but aside from the blowing of smoke up this dude's ass, what better way is there to go about this process?
-An aspiring analyst who comes from bum fuck no where
use the search function: http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/blog/the-best-networking-cold-calling-an…
best one I've ever received was this:
My name is NAME. I am a sophomore accounting major at NON TARGET with a concentration in financial analysis. I've got strong interest in the finance world, and ACQUAINTANCE OF MINE referred me to you.
I would love to set up an informational interview at your earliest convenience. I am available after 1:30 on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, and all day on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and the weekend. You can reach me at EMAIL or at PHONE. A copy of my resume is attached for your reference.
Thanks, NAME
take this with a grain of salt as I work in PWM not IB, but plenty of people want PWM as their first or second internship so while we're not as picky as IB on interns, the volume is still substantial.
what I liked about this guy is he was direct, he asked for what he wanted, and after I emailed him back "call me after 4pm today or tomorrow to set up a time," he actually followed up.
for those of you thinking "well he just got your attention because he was referred." the acquaintance of mine went to the same school as him and never met him before. he cold contacted that friend, and then when he asked that friend "is there anyone else in the area you think I should meet?" he gave him my name.
Not sure how I feel about someone asking me for an "informational interview", whatever that means...that's like straight up asking a chick you haven't met if she wants to come over to hook up
.
I like that form of e-mail. It doesn't contain any unnecessary ego fellatio, gets straight to the point.
For those who feel the urge to put some sort of disclaimer like "I appreciate you are busy, but I was hoping..." or some shit like that, learn from this e-mail. It follows the "show, don't tell" rule. It shows that it values the reader's time by not making him/her have to read anything other than the core message and request.
By avoiding that sort of apologetic language, it also conveys confidence. E-mails that feature apologies, ego fellatio etc convey (to me at least) the image of a whimpering dog that rolls its belly upwards and pisses on itself when other dogs around, bringing shame on itself and making others feel shameful having to watch that sort of shit.
Regardless of the hashtags or other email content, I think it's completely wrong to circulate a person's cold email.
That very guy could be a member here, and this forum is to ultimately help people. While we all agree the email wasn't the best, the person's action in circulating this email is far worse.
.
To those of you who take issue with the mean-spiritedness of this thread, you have a point. But in addition to showing empathy for the student, show some empathy for the bankers (this is their forum, after all).
IB analysts must relentlessly meet a very high standard 80 hrs/week and mistakes are not taken kindly. Then a cold email comes their way that is SO RIDICULOUSLY FAR BELOW THOSE STANDARDS and they can't help but find it shocking and entertaining. Honestly, that email is so unbelievably bad that it nearly defies comprehension for an analyst. They'd have a hard time empathizing with the kid because they'd have a hard time making an email so bad if they tried.
It's almost beautiful just how brilliantly and artistically bad that email is. This is top-notch entertainment, my friends – given to the analyst for free and easy to share with their fellow analyst comrades because it's already on their email!
How "Not" To Cold Email (Originally Posted: 02/19/2012)
How the fuck did this kid get into uPenn?
http://www.businessinsider.com/how-not-to-apply-for-a-wall-street-job-2…
This would be bad if he just stuck to analyst and associates, but he e-mailed some hitters as well (Scott Bok, Dhiren Shah, Howard Gellis, Sam Greene, etc.).
That sucks. Guy didn't do anything wrong necessarily, except copy and paste to the wrong box. It is not unreasonable to think he hasn't sent a BCC message before.
True. Was not smart, but I don't think he should be ridiculed for this like Jeffery Chiang.
This is seriously old, next are you going to bitch about the Iraq war?
The best dealbreaker replies:
GentlemenTrader: ...and that you fucking hippies is how you apply for a goddamn job! -Redacted UPenn '12
Guest · 20 weeks ago Cut him a break, he was smart enough to not send it to UBS.
http://dealbreaker.com/2011/09/what-wall-street-can-learn-from-one-penn…
pretty crappy e-mail minus the mistakes
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