I was not afforded the same opportunities

I am unemployed now, and an all around failure in life.

I don't understand why those fucking banks don't give people a standardized test, so that anyone can take it, and the top scorers are considered for the job.

I was not afforded the same opportunities to attend a top college as you all had. Instead I had to attend a shit school, and get a shit job. now i'm going to get another shit job.

I am so smart. I did so well on SAT and AP tests, and so well on MCAT. All in the 98-99 percentiles. I don't see why those fucking banks don't hire me.

I am 26 now.

If I had gone into a good school--and I got into two top colleges--I would have been so successful.

I want to go into IB

 

It's probably something you did, gpa, didn't network enough, dinged in interviews.

You can't just blame colleges, people break in from everywhere all the time.

 

Sometimes in life you have to take a step back and consider that maybe you won't get an opportunity to work in investment banking. That doesn't make you a failure or make your self-worth less than that of your peers, it simply means that your path in life will be different from what you expected it would be. Maybe see a therapist occasionally to discuss why you want to get a job in this industry so badly and to try to find the underlying cause of all of this frustration. I know it can be hard to hear this but be thankful you ended up somewhere else. The hours are downright brutal until you've been in the industry for a number of years (and the pay doesn't match up with the ours at all), it's very difficult to maintain strong relationships with your family if you're constantly traveling and working, and now you won't have to carry that load of stress that comes with banking that makes half of us go bald by the age of 40. And I'll let you in on a secret, half of the bankers I know are downright miserable.

What I'm trying to say is find something you like (that's reasonable) and pursue it. You're still young and you still have plenty of time to find something to be passionate about.

 
JoblessJoe:
I am unemployed now, and an all around failure in life.

I don't understand why those fucking banks don't give people a standardized test, so that anyone can take it, and the top scorers are considered for the job.

I was not afforded the same opportunities to attend a top college as you all had. Instead I had to attend a shit school, and get a shit job. now i'm going to get another shit job.

I am so smart. I did so well on SAT and AP tests, and so well on MCAT. All in the 98-99 percentiles. I don't see why those fucking banks don't hire me.

I am 26 now.

If I had gone into a good school--and I got into two top colleges--I would have been so successful.

I want to go into IB

I was going to flame this until I saw you killed your MCAT. If you can do that you definitely are smart enough to work in finance

 
JoblessJoe:
How do I break in?

Firstly, not during business hours. I recommend using the cover of night as a natural way to cover your tracks. Secondly, aim for a bank that isn't known for longer hours - this will reduce the chance that somebody is at the office when you break in. Lastly, remember to duck/dip/dive/dodge and most importantly, dodge again.

On a serious note - if you're telling the truth about your test scores, you may want to put them on your resume. Although this is 'nontraditional,' sometimes you need to think outside the box in order to stand out when applying for jobs.

 

JoblessJoe I'm not going to address WHY you're not receiving offers from banks and focus on something else so pay attention:

Life is NOT fair. Your credentials DO NOT guarantee anything which includes an offer in IB. With this being said, you have two paths you can take in life:

Option 1) Continue to drown in your sorrows about not making it into IB

Option 2) Considering alternative paths into an eventual career in IB (potentially)

I HIGHLY implore you to seek Option 2. There are greater tragedies in life than not becoming an IB. I can only speculate as to why you want to get into IB but that doesn't matter right now.

Assuming Finance is what you're interested in there are a multitude of careers within this realm. Consider them and focus on building a path into it. Whether its corporate finance, Corporate Banking, FP&A, whatever...do what you feel you'll enjoy and throw the elements of prestige out of the way.

If you don't do this and continue to wallow in your despair it sure as hell won't get you an opportunity into IB. Picking yourself up and doing something else in Finance may.

You can always get an MBA and go into IB as an Associate so that path is open as well.

Good Luck

 

(taken from a previous post of yours) 'ALSO, do those fuckers even check? If so, how do they check? I can just throw them the names of a few friends if they want to confirm I did something. But I want to say, like, I pulled in 20K a year when it was more like 2K. How would they check that?'


You may be smart, but god I wish there was a standardised test for integrity.

Stop whining. Use your intelligence to get some relevant experience. Prove yourself, and then consider applying to IB. Oh, and success is never guaranteed. Troll or not, get over yourself.

 

As someone who is smart like you (perfect SAT score), let me tell you a secret:

Besides requiring a base level of intellect, there is very little correlation between being smart and being successful.

The correlation lies a lot in execution and a bit more in luck.

The low GPA tells me that you can't execute as well as a banker would be expected to on the opportunities you're given. (To be sure, execution isn't a strength for me either, and I would never survive as a banker.)

Remember, being smart doesn't create any value. Being able to prove that a CS problem is NP-complete doesn't help me make money. Getting an 800 on the GRE Q doesn't make money or produce anything. Putting together a pitch book without any errors? That helps make money. Building a new signal for the corporate bond market? That makes money.

Getting a good SAT score takes intellect but not effort. Getting a good GPA takes intellect AND effort and execution. Being a banker takes mostly effort and execution. Thankfully for me, being a quant takes intellect and slightly less effort and execution. I also earn less than a banker.

Here is my question for you: You have the intellect. What about the effort and execution?

 

Those are some really good points, thanks a lot, did not even think about that. I'm trying now to find a job that will give me some management experience. I got one such interview, but still waiting for the guy to reply. I'm thinking about an MBA, thanks to everyone who gave good advice.

 
bballchamp2:
If you're so goddamn smart why'd you get a 3.1 at a shit school!

Because intellect doesn't mean execution. Trust me, I have personal experience.

Here's the model (continuous variables in bold for easier reading)

Success = (IdentityFunction(Intellect > Threshhold) + IdentityFunction(person works in QR)* Intellect) * Effort * Execution*(Constant + ε (luck))

Note for those who don't speak quant: IdentityFunction= 1 if statement is true; 0 if false. Edit: apparently WSO doesn't like the epsilon character. Oh well.

 

A lot of people are going to critique your post, OP. The reason why is it could be argued you're complaining and have a slight undertone of entitlement. A couple things before we get started;

1) Life isn't fair. The world was here first and it owes you nothing

2) Not making it into 'XYZ' career doesn't mean you're a failure. Even though it may feel that way, that's your perception, not reality.

No one counts how many times you fell short. It is about how you react and move forward that matters. Basically, take an objective view. Career driven people aren't personally vindictive or out to get you or screw you over. People are busy and don't have time to handhold/be polite. They have even less time to be a shoulder to cry on. This part is much easier said than done, but emotionally detach yourself from the process.

Now, here are some actionable options...

1) Crush GMATs and get a top MBA. Then by the time you're 28/29 you get an Associate role. If you play your cards right, you can try to get into a solid boutique/middle market as a junior VP. If you have your heart set on BB, then Post-MBA Associate is your goal. That means, intern 1st year summer and absolutely demolish it. Perform way beyond expectations and be humble. Effectively contact Alums in places you'd like to work. Effectively here means do you're homework before even picking up the phone/writing the email

2) Take that intelligence and apply it to the markets. Join Seeking Alpha or Sum-Zero and write up a report on Macros (e.g. interest rate movements, econometric models, systematic movements, etc.), a stock you've been following (non-band wagon. Read: Apple, Facebook, Snap, etc.). While you're researching, sign up for the CFA L1 in December and crush it. If and when you pass, granted 'Passed CFA Level 1' or '2018 CFA Level 2 Candidate' on a resume won't open all the doors, but it least it shows you have the discipline to self-study. Not to mention you'll probably deep dive into Corp fin/accounting/cap markets which is useful in banking interviews. This option, however, is geared for more buy-side. Which may be more for you as you claim you are intellectually driven. Typically buy-side shops (non-PE/VC) are more analytical. IBD is really sales/brokerage at the end of the day. Granted sophisticated sales/brokerage

3) Network your face off. Hire a career coach, join local finance related societies, contact college friends and even cold call alums, and/or whatever else will give you the leg up. I'm sure this doesn't have to be said, but blindly submitting resumes is a volume game aka not best execution

4) Join a Deal Advisory or Transactions Group at a large Consulting firm (e.g. MBB, Big 4) and get the experience. After 2 years, lever that experience and go into industry aka banking

5) Find your own deal and bank it yourself. This is an admittedly tougher option. Research a smaller pub co (non-penny) that has about zero analyst coverage and hasn't done an issuance of capital in some time. Check to see if they have out grown their capital stack (e.g. Company Credit Quality [read: D/E ratio, coverage ratio, quality of collateral, quality of earnings, etc.] is stronger than the yield they are paying on their current debt stack [I recommend looking at Term A or equivalent to start] implying they should refi). Research comparables that utilize an instrument with lower yield and then pro-forma what impact that instrument would have to the company you are targeting [FCFE, balance sheet flexibility, etc.]. Draft up a pitchbook and try to sell them [CFO/CEO] on the idea. If they like it, try to work a Statement of Work or equivalent agreement to be a 1099 non-employee to help strategize the deal. Once executed, do all the diligence, package it, and go to an appropriate investment bank with the deal leg work already completed. If you can get the bank/company engaged, then that's a win. Hell, you might even get equity promote. But--at worst--you've shown you can do the work. Just be careful not to mess around with anything securities related since you're not affiliated with a broker/dealer (aka getting paid a % off placement of securities)

Good luck and--as the English say--keep a stiff upper lip.

 

OP, this is fantastic advice. Route 1 is probably the most tried and true, and likely a MBA to Route 4 would also work depending on your work experience profile as it stands. One aspect of MBA recruiting they don't tell you is just how much that pre-MBA experience matters - i.e. essentially everything. Can't reinvent yourself in an MBA but you can round off the edges.

Be excellent to each other, and party on, dudes.
 

Thanks a lot for that advice, really appreciate it. I was thinking of an MBA, but I don't have good pre-MBA experience in finance. Just various shit jobs. I wonder if getting an MBA would be even worth it, b/c finance won't hire me b/c I only have shit jobs. Thanks again.

Thanks also to everyone else.

 

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