A big HELLO to those who can relate to this thread.
*Don't have to read.*
SHORT intro: I'm in my early 20's, went to a non-target school. Found my way to a storied and renowned IB and secured a job in the IBD division. Performed very well despite knowing virtually nothing upon my start date. Poached from 'lesser team' by most 'elite team' that is the most desired and best performing team in company due to my performance. Performed well and secured spot on said team and told I have a 'promising future'. Was ordered by SMD to help establish another team while still fulfilling all my duties on the elite team. Did so. Allegedly I have arrived. Sound spot on solid team and a stellar reputation with management.
When I was 17 I decided I wanted to be an investment banker. They got the money, the power, the girls, and were masters of their own universe. At least that's what I was told. Models in the day (Excel), bottles at night (committing to minimums at trendy nightclubs, which came with a different type of model). Investment bankers worked hard, learned the trade, moved up in the ranks, and provided a fairy-tale life for their beloved wife and family after making it big in their early 30's. Investment bankers lived the American Dream.
Here is a typical timeline of a Quarter Life Crisis ("QLC"), at least it's mine:
Week 1: 90 hours M-F, wondering if you'll be asked to leave because of your uselessness, on Friday the person in front of you gets fired.
Month 1: How did you survive? Must have been your charm/ability to kiss ass. You think you know what half of these words mean, you think you can do 20% of the basic tasks assigned to you. Is your VP on adderall? He has to be...
Month 2: Ok, you're in it. You can do this. You are smarter than these people, they've just been doing it longer. Bring it on. You're climbing this learning curve like a sherpa on their 1,000th trip.
Month 3: You have your basic duties down. Practice makes perfect but you get the idea.
Month 4: Alright, you got this, bring on a little more heat.
Month 5: Ok, more responsibilities. Not a problem. Check!
Month 6: Ok, pretty much just processing now. Oh wow, a company you used to looooovvvvee as a kid, would have been cool 3 months ago, just another set of numbers now.
Month 7: Your VP and Associate are 100% cracked out on adderall, but my god do those alignments look perfect. How old is your VP, 30? Even you're VP doesn't leave until 10pm. What does that mean for you?
Month 8: If you stay 4 more years you can be just like your Associate. They are in their late 20's have a non-existent dating life, and drive a car older and shittier than most sorority girls at your old college.
Month 9: The harder you work, the more work assigned to you. This isn't how it should work right?
Month 10: 10% of company gets laid off, must cut the weakest links. You can still be friends outside the office right?
Month 11: You swear to God, if you're get assigned a project that requires Google Maps, you're going to spend 45 minutes 'exploring' South America. You need a life outside of this office and under something other than these fluorescent lights.
Month 12: What are you doing? You hate this, what difference does $20,000 in the bank make? $20,000 is absolute chump change. What are you going to do, buy a used 3-series?
Month 13: You can be just like your Associate and VP one day! Out of shape, single, balding, greying, miserable, subordinate, defeated, depressed, anxious, and generally jealous of anyone doing better than them. Oh.... and they haven't taken a vacation in over 2 years.
Month 14: You have to go. You don't know where. You don't care. Africa, South America, Asia, next door. It doesn't matter, you need to be off the grid for at least a week. Paying $1,400 to work as a ranch hand in Montana as part of an interactive vacation? Sounds fun! Get me out of here!
Month 15: Your friend in tech that was 5th hire at a startup just announced their company got acquired. He had shares.
Month 16: Business is slow. You are wondering if the countless overtime you put in is worth it or if the company will shut/cut your division.
Month 17: You've totally disregarded IT's ability to see what you've searched on Google.
Month 18: burn out... Honestly, you just want to own a small business.
Month 19: You're over it, you don't care. Your resume is updated, so is your LinkedIn. You are getting out of here alive. Deuces.
Month 20: Biding time... A significant portion of your day is spent using company resources figuring out your next move. You're out, and you want that dedicated loser fuck on the rival team to know. What a loser. He'll be an analyst the rest of his life.
Month 21: Parents/friends/mentors, everyone says no. They don't know what it's like. You're confused.
Month 22: They love you, but there's no way they understand. You're situation in IB is unique. All they see is money and telling their friends what you do.
Month 23: You don't care what they say. You're gone. You only have 1 life to live. LIVE it. Go, be free, it doesn't matter anyway. You will never become rich or happy in banking, you've realized it's all a lie anyways.
Month 24: ???????
You finish the story.
Investment Banking Interview Course
- 7,548 questions across 469 investment banks. Crowdsourced from over 500,000 members.
- Technical, behavioral, networking, case videos, templates. All included.
- Most comprehensive IB interview course in the world.