Highest Ranked Comments

+55 Because I’m too much of a retard to work in STEM, not artsy enough to draw furry porn for cash, and too ugly for YouTube. But I sure do work hard.  Summer Associate in IB - Gen
+55 Just say he is trans and goes under a different name and you don't want to expose him Associate 2 in Consulting
+55 I see this as an absolute win Goya Beans
+55 Wow what's up with all those threads where juniors are absolute pussies? Managing Director in IB-M&A
+55 congrat on the jefferies offer CEO in PE - LBOs
+55 This debate will split among predictable ideological lines, but I believe in a baseline of universal healthcare known as the "public option" more akin to the German system than the English NHS. CRE
+55 I know this isn’t what you are looking for, but general advice for people early on in your careers (really any point in your career): don’t burn bridges. theATL
+55 Alright this might get monkey shit, but I don’t know wtf people are talking about when they say being in person gets you accelerated learning. Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+55 I have a 3.525 and I round it to a 3.55, and then round it to a 3.6. Sometimes I just round that again to a 4.0 (and then round that down to a 3.99 so it doesnt look fake) Incoming Analyst in IB - Gen
+55 Shut the fuck up about your job in AM already man, good god, no one gives a fuck that you work at PIMCO or Prudential or wherever the fuck you work. Nudnick McMooch
+55 just say due to covid and racial tensions you decided best to volunteer indefinitely instead finbrah
+55 Yes, kids, gather your guidance from the man with 🚀GME🚀 in his username  VP in IB - Cov
+55 72 Virgins will be waiting for me after the completion of the job EliteStudent11
+55 orangemarker
+55 Craziest thing I've ever seen in NYC? I think it would have to be the one time I saw a group of summer analysts at a bar who didn't talk about their internship for a full 20 minutes. DeepLearning
+54 Paragraph after paragraph I expected something about banging the guy's wife. I guess that it would have been the well deserved justice in this story. Pure gold nevertheless. Voodz
+54 Completely useless and retarded comment. Thanks. GoogleyMoogley
+54 I had an MD who was obsessed with The Smurfs. That sounds harmless enough, and I guess ultimately it is, but he’d get really weird with it. VP in PE - LBOs
+54 You fucking dumbass Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+54 Certified official® b-school prestige ranking for generalist PE (lumping together buyout and growth): Tier 1a: US Mount Olympus (Apollo / BX / Carlyle / KKR / Bain / H&F / Silver Lake) Associate 2 in PE - Growth
+54 Being concise is one of them and fuck do you need it dude Analyst 1 in PE - LBOs
+54 Same thing applies to the admissions offices of elite universities. Similar type of person, often pretty mediocre, but they inexplicably wind up with the power to dramatically change people's lives. ResMan
+54 Rare occasion where someone will directly answer your question. Reposted from another thread where I reposted, but I think covers what you want to know: Associate 2 in PE - Growth
+54 You asserted your dominance. Eric_s
+54 looks like she grinded for ib as well Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+54 I hear they really punch above their weight. Prospect in IB - Restr
+54 U guys not sayng the bank are genuinely retarded Prospect in IB-M&A
+54 I heard a great quote from Oprah: Master Your Craft. Shaynepunim
+54 Start of my first ever superday so I'm pretty nervous and I'm introducing myself to an MD: Me: Hi, great to meet you. How are you? MD: Good thanks, how are you getting on? Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+54 Guys can you just list what bank you are at? There are like 100 analyst per bank, we aren't going to know who you are bruh unless you put you got $63,459.31, just keep it multiples of 5,000, so 67,000 would be 70,000. lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
+54 Give him the whole tip, but just the tip. Otherwise it’s gay Associate 1 in PE - Other
+54 Dude anytime there's "woman" in the title you're all over it. Honestly, I will pay out of pocket to get you laid.. Rabbit
+54 can you make this into short form video i can’t read all dat monkeyvjit
+54 Buy the dip, short the vix, and fuck bitcoin. JamieDiamondHands
+54 Frankly, as someone that is still in the very beginning of your career, comparing the lives of MDs and PE Partners is pointless, and especially pointless comparing the top MDs and top Partners at MF/UMM. jobless123
+54 Blow him Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+54 Have two well thought out pitches and don’t pretend to know anything that you don’t know, like I said in the original post, know what you don’t know and acknowledge and address how those holes affect your thesis. Secyh62
+54 To use a basketball analogy, you are now the point guard. Quaneaser
+54 This is why you take kids from state schools Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
+54 Reach out to sponsors, Burger King and McDonald’s Reach out to sponsors, Burger King, and McDonald’s Oxford Comma in the above is needed to clarify BK and McD aren’t sponsors Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+54 My pronouns are sell/side Anonymous Monkey
+54 My man. You have not been “getting ghosted 24/7”. You were ghosted once. ChuckieSullivan
+54 During the major East Coast blackout in Aug 2003 I was working for a BB in credit trading at our offices on Wall St. TechBanking
+54 Easy to dunk on this kid but there reallllllly isn't that much difference between him and mommy reaching out, and the 90% of nepo hires where kids dad has a close connection with someone high up in the bank or company. Anonymous Monkey
+54 Both of you sound like kids that are just having a hard time adjusting to the realities of being an adult. I understand. It is hard, and can be painful. As adults we have to learn to be kind and empathetic to ourselves. Associate 1 in IB-M&A
+54 Holy shit do you not have anything better to do with your time Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+54 It’s insane. The waste and excess - I literally can’t wrap my head around it. Let me share a couple examples. johndoe2019
+54 It's not my best memory in a traditional sense, but I always come back to it as a prime example of the absurdity of my time in IB. CharlesCheese
+54 You guys know what you have to do. When HR investigates this do not hold back. If there is legal prosecution do not hold back. Make these people pay for what they did. Analyst 2 in IB-M&A
+54 . VP in IB - Cov
+54 Tell me you’re selling an audax portco without telling me you’re selling an audax portco  Associate 1 in PE - LBOs
+54 You should probably take a hiatus from worrying about your job and focus on solving that drinking problem. Elite_Bulge
+54 The fact the traditional banking is more important to the general economy than investment banking is painfully obvious. Associate 1 in IB - Gen
+54 I love this so much, I wish I worked with him Works at Morgan Stanley
+54 Lol realistically interns aren’t adding much value, you could do whatever work you are asking probably faster and maybe add 30 minutes to your night. Let them enjoy their summer, fucking dick. Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
+54 Really personal preference. Do you want to look at core business issues forever or would you prefer to have a view at the center of business issues? VP in IB - Cov
+54 Pretty sure BB Banks give free coffee to employees. Therefore Goldman is disqualified MergersNexecutions
+54 I'll say it once and I'll say it again. Take the wealthiest 1 billion people and put them inside a bin and then take the poorest 6 billion and put them in a separate bin. Hölder
+54 Convince me to buy a house is the title of the post bozo. Simply answering the question yomama6969_69
+54 Because you’re likely an insufferable dweeb based on the way you write about yourself Associate 1 in RE - Comm
+54 Boggles my mind that we dont have full autonomy on where we work post pandemic, truly. When YE hits, no one is going to make top bucket because they were in the office 5 days a week. Deal Team Six
+54 My last name is Kohlberg - FUCK Prospect in IB - Gen
+54 I’m not surprised you’re single. Intern in RE - Comm
+54 Nerd Anonymous Monkey
+54 i fucking wish i could go back in time to 3 minutes ago when i didnt read this braindead shitpost  onetwothree123___
+54 Lmfao at saying 700-800k a year is "comfortable". You are wealthy.  Intern in Consulting
+54 I think not going to the interview is ridiculous and the email is equally ridiculous. Tons and tons of people every year break into IB with limited to no technical knowledge. JonJay55
+54 They had us in the first half I'm not gonna lie harr345
+54 Thought I ended a HireVue question but it actually caught me saying "I'm not gonna get this shit" and laughing to myself Discounted Smash Bros
+54 The ability to do mock interviews with me. Prospect in Other
+54 Moving from one career full of narcissistic assholes to another career full of narcissistic assholes. AllDay_028
+54 Contrarian here, in the 45-50 hour / week club. + CFA studying in own time but that doesn't count. EatClenTrenHard
+54 Him putting his grievances in your 360 was a declaration of war. Respond accordingly. gbp.4.lb
+54 I gave +1s both to the original post and Dingdong's reply. First off, breathe. Let's look at the upside. APAE
+54 the biggest drivers of the markets are not who occupies the white house. here's what to expect, assuming the Donald doesn't fly off the handle and upper deck the King of Saudi Arabia's golden toilet... thebrofessor
+54 I have given and received my fair share of reviews. If someone says that to you, as an analyst, it means that you lack common sense...such as, thinking it is OK to practice Dalio's principles at the bank you're at. hominem
+54 Couple years ago, I was interviewing for a summer internship at a bond rating agency. The subway fucked me over and I couldn't make it to my interview at 9am. 000killa
+54 Old boss tore his E-cig around the office. Analyst 2 in PE - Other
+54 What’s so frustrating about this whole argument is that you’re claiming, under the guise of patriotism, that selfish behavior is the correct way to navigate this environment, despite that being the exact OPPOSITE of patrio Incoming Analyst in IB - Cov
+54 I think I said this in response to another one of your posts. If I wasn't clear, let me reiterate: SIMP Richard.5
+54 Alright Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+54 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Welles_Crowther Sir Sage Kelly
+54 bofa DEEZ NUTS haha fuckin geed Intern in IB - Cov
+54 [deleted for anonymity reasons - apologies] macro bruin
+53 congrats on micropenis VP in IB - Restr
+53 Masturbating LARPing Furry conventions Experimental drugs Shoplifting NuclearPenguins
+53 Harvard_GS_HBS_KKRI'll start. SAT: 1580/1600 ACT: 36/36 LSAT: 177/180 APs: 9x 5/5, 2x 4/5, 1x 3/5 lloydblankfined
+53 Wrong forum. BillyAckman
+53 Will comment given I'm an entrepreneur and work in finance.  TLBandChill
+53 Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
+53 Can confirm - personally know several analysts who retired after A2A promo  VP in PE - Growth
+53 I fucking hate Human Resources - waste of oxygen the lot of them. Like out of all the things you could come up with, they pick popping balloons and spamming the space bar as a measure of potential success... English Hardo
+53 Everyone at the knicks bars while EVR kids are grinding on day 3 of training 🥀 Intern in IB - Gen
+53 Congrats on your acceptance to Stern  Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
+53 Must feel pretty awesome to get the occasional snack. Like a toddler in pre-school, work hard enough and you may get the occasional fruit snack or two.  the_failed_doctor
+53 My man, Genghis Khan kicks the tar out everyone in that holy trinity. PrivateTechquity 🚀🚀🚀
+53 Same reason why no one in the NBA is on r/basketball or Basketball Oasis trying_my_best
+53 I don’t actually think nepotism is inherently bad. CapTableTriage
+53 Let’s fucking go boys, don’t have to think twice about getting guac at chipotle anymore. Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+53 You are fine, just be respectful of suffering on both sides. Senior VP in CorpDev