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+617When I was an intern once, had an MD go to Chicago to close on a deal that was heating up. Guy was very much so "new money" and didn't act like the conservative traditional banker.GridironCEO
+510hopeful123 Recruiting isn't going as planned huhProspect in IB-M&A
+469If you are a female, I would like to congratulate you on securing a return offer.Intern in IB-M&A
+401Dragon deez nuts over your faceAnalyst 1 in IB-M&A
+399How are you straight if you hooked up with a dude?Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+358You're probably fucked to be completely honest. You should have started the process much earlier.cloutape
+307Depends if my wife checks the credit card billsEngineer in Other
+301I don't know you personally, but I can confidently say you've never had a worse idea.Five Star Man
+300i guess if you can't hack it in banking you can't hack it in the world of made-to-order sandwiches crafted by experts with the freshest of ingredients. Eat fresh, scrubsloppysteve123
+273This is how careers are made.kodi
+239Shut the fuck up pussy don't hijack the threadIntern in IB-M&A
+233I am just an undergrad but this is very much my plan at the moment, a couple of years IB then switch into REPE (which looks like a really cool gig) then go home and have sex with youSteve Wibble
+233Let me guess, you're a UVA grad working in Real Estate in Charlotte making roughly $90k and you're excited about driving your new basic package model 3 to your next vacation in Charleston.Max Heiliger
+232Marry her dadchimpnotsimp
+222A long time ago back in the aftermath of the GFC (disregard the title in my profile, I'm old) I had someone ask me a variation of this question. It was "If [our bank] were an animal, which animal would we be?"Analyst 3+ in IB - Gen
+220Honestly getting tired of this view that I'm seeing. Even today, in no other profession can you find the upward mobility and high starting salary that IB provides.Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+219You should absolutely leave and pm me the posting to replace your role.Teller in Non-profit
+219What's her IG @ Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+218I'm giving way more time to this post than I should:Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+215PE Firm: "We invest in B+ companies. They have a lot of potential, but have some flaw that helps us buy at a discount (recent managment changes, disruption, etc.).Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+213Gotta be honest, I get pretty sick of this comment. We get it, you're sooo smart even IB isn't challenging enough for you. Maybe you can start by challenging yourself to do more than go through the motions.Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+209relax with the "we", internAnalyst 1 in IB-M&A
+208Get wasted tonight, watch a movie and sleep a lot. Tomorrow will be the time to snort an Adderall pill and get planning.Prospect in IB - Gen
+203I'm a girl but thank yousmol_depressedanalyst
+201Yeah, I'll come over the top again with another one. Why the hell are so many of you incels on this website now?Associate 1 in PE - Growth
+200Ok it's time we admit that those 13 goldman analysts are fucking legendsrezjopls
+199Dumbest thing I said was in response to the dumbest question I ever received.newyorkermonkey
+197Sleep with his wife? Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+196thebrofessor, I appreciate getting looped in this!wsa007
+194There's a reason you're not at Blackstone, and it's not because of your Tier 23 undergrad institution; your MD was testing you and, unsurprisingly, you failed miserably.Non-PC Broker
+191Friday night: drinks at a roof top bar. Usually $20-25 a drink, but thats what this industry is all about right, blowing excessive cash. Hit an upscale bar, then head to a club.Deal Team Six
+191Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+190For many, its the moment they become a republican(after they see the post tax amount)Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+188Hey bro, they posted a rainbow flag and a black square. Citi CARES, ok?Associate 3 in PE - LBOs
+187CL* not CV, pls fix - I expected more attention to detail from someone who dings kids for CL file namesAssociate 2 in CorpDev
+187Did you need to use your little consulting frameworks to figure that one out? Associate 1 in PE - LBOs
+183/Anonymous Monkey
+183 Intern in IB-M&A: Minimum 800k Certified Investment Manager who Makes $500k+ -Analyst 3+ in HF - EquityHedge
+177I had my 10 year marriage anniversary this year, so here goes. Life in general is hard and people of all ages and marital status have struggles as time passes. Synergy_or_Syzygy
+176Also, I did say "no homo" so I'm goodMr.JoeBaskin
+175You don't give up.I3DCashStaffer
+173lmfao you sound like the type of person that I had to pretend to like when I was interviewing "I just signed my MFPE offer so I'm feeling thankful" Lord help usAnalyst 1 in IB - Cov
+173*senior associateidaho
+173it's called cocaine you moronguggroth93
+172Do not take your life over this man. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I can't imagine what you're going through, but I have had people close to me take their own lives.oceandrive
+171Nobody:Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+169Nope, both interns were male. What made it even better was that one of the the female analysts was in a relationship with an analyst from another firm.el bee oh
+169Genuinely enjoyed reading this. Brutal situation I know, but a great inside look as to how the sausage is made. Appreciate the write-up.Business School in IB - Gen
+169YEs, it is very competitive, especially if you are at a non-target.  Some questions...and points.  You mentioned 3,000 emails, but honestly that's not too many over 3 years (if that includes simple Linkedin connection
+167Feel like this has been answered a million times but since we're all stuck in quarantine I'll lay it out for you simply.Quaneaser
+167The answer to this is absolutely relative.numbermassager
+167Yeah I hate liberals significantly more than I did before sloppysteve123
+163How dare kids not try to network with the all mighty baddealflow12, this industry is not what it used to be.elmadrileño
+162If the bank wanted you to have a girlfriend, they would've issued you oneMaddCow
+162Look at the forecast model and see how it is built up.  Do you have any breakout on a segment level?  Can revenue cleanly be broken down so that you can isolate price vs.Associate 2 in PE - LBOs
+161-Associate 2 in PE - LBOs
+159Wtf did I just read lolAnalyst 1 in PE - LBOs
+159Intern in IB - Gen
+155Same thing happened to me bruh. I'm blacklisted from Lizard and Nevercore. Associate 2 in IB-M&A
+155Nice try, IRS. HuskySized
+154Are you fucking kidding me? Get the coffee and shut the hell up.SECfinance
+154Ok - you can continue to have regrets and feel bad about your situation or you can take ownership of this. I've been where you are before.Arroz con Pollo
+153Here's what I usually say: "Hi, [insert woman name]. My name is FTPinsider and I am an INVESTMENT BANKING ANALYST at FTP ($140k as an1 btw)." Usually they say:FTPinsider
+152Here's the TRUTH:Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
+150Think I will get a return offer but don't know if I will accept. Went into finance for the hookers and cocaine and all I got is they/them's.pronouns_are_for_incels
+148Yes, OP is a motherfucker.VP in IB - Gen
+147Look at yourself in the mirror with all your free time and ask yourself where you went wrong in deciding this was worth postingAssociate 2 in PE - LBOs
+146No, what if she dumps you dumbass?CEO in PE - Other
+145True.Gucci Loafers
+144I know countless students that could blow all you target kids out of the water with all that they have done to break in.Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+144That moment a democrat becomes a republicaniggs99988
+144One that isn't doing seamless right nowAnalyst 1 in IB - Gen
+144Did she take her boyfriend's name?JonnieMac
+142you are fucking idioticIntern in IB - Cov
+140yeah if this was Walmart Staff Oasis then he'd have a valid pointRE-PE
+140These dudes are fucking cancerousleonardo dicaprisun
+140I mean are you proud you did this?lost_canadian
+139$100MM by 35. $10 by 40.CRE
+139A few things here and advice for younger posters. This is a great post because this feeling is real, very common, and sucks! Associate 2 in PE - Growth
+137Patz, welcome to Wall Street Oasis! I'm sure a few high school seniors will be here shortly to offer your wife some great advice on making MD.Guest1655
+137Oh, come on, give him something to work with.mmpewso
+136Just be a chad and beat your MD's assAssociate 3 in IB-M&A
+136In college people are liberal and all for "rights", whatever tf that means. After graduating and we see how much we get taxed we then become republican. Welcome to life.Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+135Not me but a friend of mine;Jaxom
+135Interviewed at Goldman after my freshmen year for some diversity summer analyst role, this was in my prime years before my GPA went down the toileGridironCEO
+135Winter = Fintechstoryofmylife
+135EV / Nuts BustedAssociate 1 in IB-M&A
+135Be more responsive and have more attention to detailAnalyst 2 in IB-M&A
+135Great post and nice to see someone with some experience weigh in on reality. As someone quite a bit older, I've seen the randomness you describe many times over.rickle
+135Dated a girl once whose dad had 9 figures. Not sure if he even finished college, started some manufacturing businesses. Retired in his 50s to travel the world.Angus Macgyver
+134IDK how feasible the Golden State Warriors would be, even if you're coming from GS then KKR...Associate 1 in IB - Gen
+133In '87, Huey released this, Fore!, their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is "Hip to be Square", a song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics.TacosDeLengua
+132The pendulum is at a 90 degree angle right now. Everyone here knows it.Intern in IB - Gen
+132Walk up to your dad "Hey dad, do you have any friends in IB I can talk to and network with?" = Goldman TMTJoeEXOTIC
+132you're already on wso at work, starting good habits while young is keyAndyLouis
+131Jesus Christ, Isaiah_53_5 Composite Prestige Ranking:PrestigeCaller
+131You have solid M&A experience and can exit to MBA, PE, HF, whatever you want.  You've already made it champ. You are the winner. Don't let anyone take that away from youPainterDry
+131Thanks for this, some good stuff in here. Didn't need to send me spiraling into an existential crisis with that last sentence tho.Analyst 1 in IB-M&A