+706 When I was an intern once, had an MD go to Chicago to close on a deal that was heating up. Guy was very much so "new money" and didn't act like the conservative traditional banker. GridironCEO
+524 hopeful123 Recruiting isn't going as planned huh Prospect in IB-M&A
+476 If you are a female, I would like to congratulate you on securing a return offer. Intern in IB-M&A
+427 How are you straight if you hooked up with a dude? Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+414 Dragon deez nuts over your face Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+409 You're probably fucked to be completely honest. You should have started the process much earlier. cloutape
+350 i guess if you can't hack it in banking you can't hack it in the world of made-to-order sandwiches crafted by experts with the freshest of ingredients. Eat fresh, scrub sloppysteve123
+311 This is how careers are made. kodi
+311 Depends if my wife checks the credit card bills Engineer in Other
+305 I don't know you personally, but I can confidently say you've never had a worse idea. Five Star Man
+304 Shut the fuck up pussy don't hijack the thread Intern in IB-M&A
+279 You should absolutely leave and pm me the posting to replace your role. Teller in Non-profit
+267 Ernest Hemingway — 'There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.' Pussy galore
+261 A long time ago back in the aftermath of the GFC (disregard the title in my profile, I'm old) I had someone ask me a variation of this question. It was "If [our bank] were an animal, which animal would we be?" Analyst 3+ in IB - Gen
+258 I am just an undergrad but this is very much my plan at the moment, a couple of years IB then switch into REPE (which looks like a really cool gig) then go home and have sex with you Steve Wibble
+257 Marry her dad chimpnotsimp
+254 bruhchain
+251 Ok stinkypants
+247 GS_Diversity_Analyst
+247 Honestly getting tired of this view that I'm seeing. Even today, in no other profession can you find the upward mobility and high starting salary that IB provides. Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+246 I'm going to be brutally honest with you -- that ship has already sailed. Most of the people who end up getting offers have been networking since ~7th grade. Analyst 1 in PE - LBOs
+245 Dumbest thing I said was in response to the dumbest question I ever received. Anonymous Monkey
+238 What’s her IG @  Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+236 I’m giving way more time to this post than I should: Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+236 Let me guess, you're a UVA grad working in Real Estate in Charlotte making roughly $90k and you're excited about driving your new basic package model 3 to your next vacation in Charleston. Max Heiliger
+235 You know this industry is fucked when someone telling their wife they can’t make the family vacation is super badass Intern in IB - Gen
+229 Sleep with his wife?  Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+227 This guy said LGTBQIA+ LOL. Go kick rocks Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+224 Yeah, I’ll come over the top again with another one. Why are so many of you incels on this website now? Associate 1 in PE - Growth
+222 relax with the "we", intern Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+219 PE Firm: "We invest in B+ companies. They have a lot of potential, but have some flaw that helps us buy at a discount (recent managment changes, disruption, etc.). Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+219 Genuinely enjoyed reading this. Brutal situation I know, but a great inside look as to how the sausage is made. Appreciate the write-up. Business School in IB - Gen
+217 This has got to be one of the best topic headers to ever exist on this site Anonymous Monkey
+217 thebrofessor, I appreciate getting looped in this! wsa007
+217 CL* not CV, pls fix - I expected more attention to detail from someone who dings kids for CL file names Associate 2 in CorpDev
+213 Gotta be honest, I get pretty sick of this comment. We get it, you’re sooo smart even IB isn’t challenging enough for you. Maybe you can start by challenging yourself to do more than go through the motions. Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+212 By way of background, Macron graduated from the top French school of public administration, the Ecole Nationale d'Administration (ENA). Nearly all French presidents and ministers come out of ENA. Kazhar
+210 Get wasted tonight, watch a movie and sleep a lot. Tomorrow will be the time to snort an Adderall pill and get planning. Prospect in IB - Gen
+209 Don't worry, you were already a tool from the start Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+209 looks good thx, one minor comment: add age 49 - lose virginity Analyst 2 in IB-M&A
+205 I’m a girl but thank you smol_depressedanalyst
+202 There's a reason you're not at Blackstone, and it's not because of your Tier 23 undergrad institution; your MD was testing you and, unsurprisingly, you failed miserably. Non-PC Broker
+200 Ok it's time we admit that those 13 goldman analysts are fucking legends rezjopls
+196 literally everything makes women uncomfortable. fat people make women uncomfortable. frankly, women make themselves uncomfortable. yes, women have way too much power. xgozax
+195 Friday night: drinks at a roof top bar. Usually $20-25 a drink, but thats what this industry is all about right, blowing excessive cash. Hit an upscale bar, then head to a club. Deal Team Six
+195 For many, its the moment they become a republican(after they see the post tax amount) Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+195 YEs, it is very competitive, especially if you are at a non-target.  Some questions...and points.  You mentioned 3,000 emails, but honestly that's not too many over 3 years (if that includes simple Linkedin connection requ WallStreetOasis.com
+195 *senior associate idaho
+194 Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+191 Nobody: Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+190 Did you need to use your little consulting frameworks to figure that one out?  Associate 1 in PE - LBOs
+189 Hey bro, they posted a rainbow flag and a black square. Citi CARES, ok? Associate 3 in PE - LBOs
+187 The Chad 1st year analyst vs the virgin 2nd year associate Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+185 Intern in IB-M&A: Minimum 800k Certified Investment Manager who Makes $500k+ - Analyst 3+ in HF - EquityHedge
+184 I had my 10 year marriage anniversary this year, so here goes. Life in general is hard and people of all ages and marital status have struggles as time passes.  Synergy_or_Syzygy
+184 Old comment I made. Good luck. VP in PE - Growth
+184 Also, I did say "no homo" so I'm good Mr.JoeBaskin
+184 You don't give up. I3DCashStaffer
+183 / Anonymous Monkey
+180 I suggest verbalizing observations about the appearances of females in the office. imposter_syndrome
+179 **Interviewer walked into the room, picked up my resume, read it for 3 minutes in front of me without saying a word** CharlesCheese
+176 Look at the forecast model and see how it is built up.  Do you have any breakout on a segment level?  Can revenue cleanly be broken down so that you can isolate price vs. Associate 2 in PE - LBOs
+176 lmfao you sound like the type of person that I had to pretend to like when I was interviewing "I just signed my MFPE offer so I'm feeling thankful" Lord help us Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+176 Nice try, IRS.  HuskySized
+174 Is this a stealth Tech vs. IB thread Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+174 it's called cocaine you moron guggroth93
+173 Nope, both interns were male. What made it even better was that one of the the female analysts was in a relationship with an analyst from another firm. el bee oh
+172 Do not take your life over this man. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I can't imagine what you're going through, but I have had people close to me take their own lives. oceandrive
+170 The answer to this is absolutely relative. numbermassager
+168 Yeah I hate liberals significantly more than I did before  sloppysteve123
+168 If the bank wanted you to have a girlfriend, they would've issued you one MaddCow
+168 Feel like this has been answered a million times but since we're all stuck in quarantine I'll lay it out for you simply. Quaneaser
+168 True. Anonymous Monkey
+167 A few things here and advice for younger posters. This is a great post because this feeling is real, very common, and sucks!  Associate 2 in PE - Growth
+167 Great post and nice to see someone with some experience weigh in on reality. As someone quite a bit older, I've seen the randomness you describe many times over. rickle
+166 How dare kids not try to network with the all mighty baddealflow12, this industry is not what it used to be. the_inquisitor
+165 Always remember who you work for. You definitely don’t work for your VP. You don’t work for your Partners. You don’t work for your company. They might review your work, they might pay you. Analyst 2 in IB-M&A
+165 In '87, Huey released this, Fore!, their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is "Hip to be Square", a song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics. TacosDeLengua
+164 Yes, OP is a motherfucker. VP in IB - Gen
+164 Not me but a friend of mine; Jaxom
+164 - Associate 2 in PE - LBOs
+164 sounds like you prefer to spend your rare free time with men you sure this sexual frustration isnt from not going all in on your "real" desires, aka smashing other dudes? Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+164 Wtf did I just read lol Analyst 1 in PE - LBOs
+163 Depends if the MD converted her that night Austerity
+162 As a woman in high finance, I think it's totally worth it. Why? 1) In my experience, self-confident men with BDE don't shy away from high-earning women with serious careers Nicole112
+162 Intern in IB - Gen
+161 I know countless students that could blow all you target kids out of the water with all that they have done to break in. Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+160 MD in my group (who is very much a relationship guy and rarely gets involved in execution / technical aspects of deals) got us a buy-side advisory role on a deal that brought in over $40 million in fees. Associate 1 in IB - Gen
+160 Same thing happened to me bruh. I'm blacklisted from Lizard and Nevercore.  Associate 2 in IB-M&A
+158 Had a phone informational, which went smoothly for the most part. wynd93282
+157 Look at yourself in the mirror with all your free time and ask yourself where you went wrong in deciding this was worth posting Associate 2 in PE - LBOs
+157 This is a great question that never really gets paved out here in WSO. I just turned 25 and making a little over 7 figures a year. This is completely possible if you have the right mentors and ideas. rossjohnson_1
+156 The pendulum is at a 90 degree angle right now. Everyone here knows it. Intern in IB - Gen
+156 Here's the TRUTH: Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
+155 Ironic how each side claims the other are snowflakes and yet they both get offended so easily by stupid meaningless shit thats not hurting anyone Incoming Analyst in IB - Gen
+155 Think I will get a return offer but don’t know if I will accept. Went into finance for the hookers and cocaine and all I got is they/them’s. pronouns_are_for_incels
+155 Are you fucking kidding me? Get the coffee and shut the hell up. SECfinance
+154 because I, like everyone else in this industry, have no clue who i am and what i want, and i'm too addicted to the lifestyle to get off without a plan Associate 3 in PE - LBOs
+154 Here's what I usually say: "Hi, [insert woman name]. My name is FTPinsider and I am an INVESTMENT BANKING ANALYST at FTP ($140k as an1 btw)." Usually they say: FTPinsider
+152 EV / Nuts Busted Associate 1 in IB-M&A