+92 you seem lame so at least you fit in Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
+92 The client name? Takeshita Issaokei I'm actually a squirrel
+91 Below is 100% factual: Goldman kids tend to be culty hardos MS is fratty af in a northeastern WASP-y kind of way (not an antebellum kind of way) VP in PE - LBOs
+91 I mean not to rain on your parade but isn’t that fairly sexiest of Goldman considering more than twice as many male apply vs female . DOW30k
+91 This post more quiet than the Baird Bonus post Prospect in IB - Cov
+91 I fail to understand why she was being applaud. For starters she broke the law and blatantly disregarded our immigration process something hundreds of thousands of people have been through lawfully. RedRage
+91 I wasn’t worth much the previous three decades so I’ll take this lottery ticket. VP in PE - LBOs
+91 You're thinking is very linear. When I first started in investment banking I thought to myself "How can I limit all the tasks that are not revenue-generating to the firm". QuiltEmerson
+91 Yes. The most annoying posts are formatted like this, it’s almost as if algos write them: GreatCompromiser
+91 Depends. If you like finance because you're just really interested in finance and you want to build a career on it, then hey, you do you and get as immersed in the culture as you can. Layne Staley
+91 . Associate 2 in IB-M&A
+91 http://lmgtfy.com/?q=corporate+development</a">Sure thing Making Gravy
+91 Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this: Anonymous Monkey
+91 Judging by your ER background, you'll soon find out what it's like for yourself, so I wouldn't worry about others' opinions Pussy galore
+90 You know those people who put their pronouns in Zoom - lol. VP in PE - LBOs
+90 People say they can pull out, but they cum right into the vagina of corporate culture. And they say poetry is dead. nutmegger189
+90 Prospect vs Incoming Freshman. A true battle of titans. Investment Analyst in HF - EquityHedge
+90 your tag caught my eye after a few beers so this could get interesting. btw I'm not reviewing anything so this is a first draft. thebrofessor
+90 Jokes on you Im a diagnosed alcoholic suck my cock fkjdfjh
+90 Gtfo immediately man, no job is worth more than your life No one on this forum that were in your shoes and jumped ship ever regretted it Works at PJT Partners
+90 Heard a guy pronounce Deutsche Bank "Bulge bracket"; never heard a mispronunciation that bad The Pharma Guy
+90 So Mickey Mouse is talking to his lawyer and and his lawyer says, "I'm sorry Mickey you can't divorce Minnie on the grounds that she is incredibly silly." Mickey replies "I didn't say she's incredibly silly, I said she's f jb2
+90 It's because you missed out and can never experience high school again. It's probably one of the best times in a persons life. Prospect in IB-M&A
+90 “I don’t work there” “WE get paid below Street” Classic Citi Literacy Skills carerthosetoyou
+90 I may come in late, but I do leave early urmaaam
+90 Almost all of them. It seems totally lost on people that the job is basically the same anywhere you go with the exception of different color schemes on PPT.  Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+90 Yes, but i put both phones in the same pocket to compensate for something i dont want to get into. I also take both phones out whenever i sit at a table and stack them on top of each other. F2_esc_God
+89 My hope had always been that by the time AI became capable of fully replacing junior and mid-level bankers, I would have made it to ED or MD, where the focus is more relationship-driven, but now I realize GS under Blankfein
+89 I will always remember one of the first times I had a phone interview for an internship. Expecting a call at a certain time, I was role playing how the call would go and putting to much thought into how to start the call. Don Johnson
+89 Roark associates on their way to start the "Dave please cum on my chicken" trend ibmeatball23
+89 1. Don't ask for work, as mentioned above. Take any downtime you can get Pepperoni Toni
+89 Mine is "Investment Banking Analyst at PJT RSSG, currently holding an offer from a top MF PE firm (think BX/Apollo/KKR)" Intern in IB-M&A
+89 “Hey man - thanks for your note, happy to chat. Shoot me a calendar invite along with your resume. Afternoons are generally better” Intern in IB - Gen
+89 this thread is boring as fuck. Let me tell you how somebody making a good income, a lot of it passively, by no means wealthy, no kids to support, is spending their money. DINKs they call us. GoldenCinderblock
+89 Also posting from a throwaway account, since this forum generally isn't the friendliest to girls, so don't want to reveal my gender with my main account (I'm female and in banking too). banking876
+89 I am operating under the assumption that you actually were drunk and didn't have the full capacity to understand what you were typing. Monty Burns
+89 Think it's funny that a bunch of people that probably fetishized banking when they were in college are shitting on a kid that's still in that phase of life lol. Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+89 You don't truly understand the value of great HR people until you've done two things: managed a business and tried to build a team (i.e., had to do some of their work) Nouveau Richie
+89 thanks for sharing. this forum was a big help in getting this article published. alexander.saeedy
+89 Evercore rents out a bigger island molderingpeanuts
+89 I've never personally been bitched out or yelled at since starting in banking, but have seen others. I think it's unprofessional as fuck to actually scream or insult someone. Associate 2 in IB-M&A
+89 Fatass ConsultingKid2022
+89 I mean, yeah that’s a good plan if you’re an underachiever. I personally got a BB offer after my sophomore year and then an EB offer junior year. Prospect in IB-M&A
+89 Thanks Layne Staley and BobTheBaker for firing numerous flares into the sky. APAE
+89 Asks socially retarded questions. Works as a quant. Everything checks out here. Intern in IB - Gen
+89 If youre not tipping your MD then you shouldn't be in banking Anonymous Monkey
+89 nah just a cringe student who’s seeking attention  Intern in IB - Cov
+89 Knew a guy from my SA in London. He would regularly use the entire meal stipend to load up on personal groceries for the office (mainly power bars and caffeinated drinks), and would pop adderral consistently. Associate 1 in PE - LBOs
+89 X Æ A-12 I'm actually a squirrel
+88 What a comedicly bad take on the source of inequality. SteelGun
+88 “Too busy to be posting here” > proceeds to post here lol Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+88 Sugan dese nuts Intern in IB - Gen
+88 Hope the surgery goes well man. 🙏 Alouatta genus
+88 Ok, what's your Venmo? I will literally pay you to write more of these. One and Done Analyst
+88 Deloitte Prospect in PE - Growth
+88 Pucker up big boi and time to get a wax you’ll be VP yourself before you know it! Associate 1 in VC
+88 Need her instagram to make that call mate. StarTrekJunky3355
+88 Aren't zoom calls stored in the cloud? Is it possible to share the video with us so we can better judge what you need to do next/and if there will be any repercussions for you? baddealflow12
+88 Drop link for WSO support Intern in IB-M&A
+88 Lol why does this seem like something out of like Pride and Prejudice or some shit like that. “Did you hear which one of the neighborhood boys won’t be making it back from the war?” NuclearPenguins
+87 Make a copy and study it enough to put on your own resume as deal experience. Intern in IB-M&A
+87 Confucius, 2024 Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+87 This is peak job security Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
+87 Thank you for this comment, this is helpful. How did you have time to write this IBD_007
+87 Slow day at Moelis I see punk
+87 Have you unironically been asking on calls with analysts how to speak like an investment banker? You absolute tool lmfao Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+87 You don't say shit. Departures are normal in banking, and the team will staff up as appropriate when it happens. One day, you will be a "Brian", and you don't want some Analyst 1 ratting you out inadvertently. Associate 1 in CorpDev
+86 Reply all to the chain and say “Not sure I’m needed here - Thx.” KageSelly
+86 Every intern takes turns wrestling a shirtless Lloyd Blankfein in a kiddie pool full of mud and those who can pin him get offers. Undercover meme
+86 Interview was going pretty well, was from 1:30 to 2:00 or something, I looked up at the clock saw 2:00 and for some stupid reason just sighed really loud and said well okay, and that ended it. guggroth93
+86 "TorontoMonkey1328" Hey, crap analyst. Stop throwing monkey crap and get my g'dmn work done. Thanks. reformed
+86 You know if the VP sees this it’s probably going to be a bad look for you, this is such a unique situation it’s basically doxxing lol boutiquetard
+86 "LeveredCat" MD of Russian Gulag. Pug
+86 Bro this post is so refreshing - Tired of all those weak people / daddy kid crying all day long. Most people crying about investment banking broke into because the system got them there. Mario2385
+86 Just a reminder to not feel discouraged when reading this thread. I'm a second-year analyst and I'm still paying off my student debt and I have about 20k in savings. Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
+86 Im giving my parents 1/4 of my bonus this year and banking the rest. Anonymous Monkey
+86 So you're saying that you don't like paying $4k/month to live in a shithole, just to be told you're cis-male patronizing scum when you try to buy a $17 Corona Light for the hottest girl (a 6/10, mind you) at the bar? Pmc2ghy
+86 Sorry, I'll edit it slightly. Please read closely. You: "mom can your brother get me a job at the Goldman Sachs?" Prospect in IB-M&A
+86 . Anonymous Monkey
+86 Good post but you’re asking the wrong question. Bull or bear? That is the question. Namaste. Associate 3 in PE - LBOs
+86 What in the literal fuck are you talking about FinanceWannaBe44
+86 Show your boss who is boss by responding with a “tentative” to the invite. hiit
+85 I saw an intern at a BB checking in on his first day, and when he was taking his ID out of his wallet, a bag of blow fell out brosephstalin
+85 My dad drives a blacked-out 7 series Analyst 3+ in PE - Other
+85 I would not recommend coming to Chicago. For example, below is an average day: VP in PE - Growth
+85 Not sure what is more insane really: the fact that kids were not only raped but murdered and no one has been arrested, the fact that Trump’s name appears more in the Epstein files than Jesus’ name appears in the Bible, the CRE
+85 never heard of it but sounds jewish - should be an automatic semi target just for that Intern in IB-M&A
+85 Non-finance advice here. Cheaters will blame you for everything to absolve themselves from guilt. She did 50 things wrong here and you’re the one forgiving her?? Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+85 Many of the posts in question seem to be mental masturbatory exercises concocted by the undergrads at IU Kelly Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+85 Never know when you might need the info. Interview going bad? Smile and say I know where your kids go to school. HFer_wannabe
+85 Look inwards my brother zeroebitda
+85 While I don't necessarily agree with this guy's approach, cut him a little slack. He's an immigrant looking to improve his kid's life. Associate 2 in PE - LBOs
+85 One of the reasons I like banking culture is for the most part everyone is pretty open about being a dick and being there for the money. Intern in IB-M&A
+85 Strong first post monkey_brah
+85 Stub Associate, M&A, MM Bank $175k base / $50k signing bonus / Unknown Stub Bonus (Will edit when I know) VP in IB - Cov
+85 They're just butt hurt because their checks are so much smaller. Mephistopheles
+85 Lateral to moelis where they rip you a new asshole eventhf
+85 literally only refer to numbers in basis points. throwaway99944
+85 Thanks I think got cancer from reading that. BananaCrazy3620
+85 You have to keep in mind who comes to this site. There are people on this site who will go as far as saying that if youre in GS Natural Resources its not a top group and exiting will be difficult, or JPM consumer... Brownfield Capital