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Wall Street Oasis » Forums » I-Banking Bullpen
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Life after Investment Banking
 

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anonymousman's picture
anonymousman
      IB
 
 
(Senior Gorilla, 789
 
Points)
 on 9/9/12 at 12:00pm
Stephen Ridley plays at a school

Like a majority of people who are on this website, I used to come on here and write bullshit about a life partly my own, partly fantasy. I'm now going to uncloak the anonymous man and tell you my story.

My name is Stephen Ridley. I graduated from a top tier British University with a First Class Honours Degree in Philosophy, Politics and Economics in 2010 and went straight into IBD at a top tier European Investment Bank, after interning there in 2009. I worked in the top team (on a revenue basis) for 16 months, before quitting in October 2011. I want to tell you about that experience, and about what has happened since then, about how I left the green to chase my dream. This will be blunt and honest. I do not mean to offend, quite the opposite, I hope to inspire! Again, this isn't an attack on those who choose to be bankers, it's just me sharing my experience together with the lessons I've learnt, and hopefully it speaks to a few people. If you look at the picture above you'll see a picture of what I do now. It's a little different from where I was 6 months ago!

Banking is fucking brutal. I knew this after my internship, but I didn't care. I wanted money. I wanted respect. I wanted to be a somebody in the eyes of myself and others. But most of all, I wanted money. Why? Because money is freedom. Money means I can wear what I want, live where I want, go where I want, eat what I want, be who I want. Money would make me happy. Right? Well... not exactly I'm afraid. In fact, money didn't seem to make any of the bankers happy. Not one person in the roughly 200 I got to know in banking were happy. Yet all earned multiples of the national average salary.

The reality of banking is this. Like everyone there, I worked my ass to the bone, working mind numbingly boring work. My life was emails, excel, powerpoint, meetings, endless drafts and markups about shit I couldn't give less of a fuck about, edits, drafts, edits, drafts, edits, send to printers, pick up, courier, meetings, more work, multitasking, boredom, boredom, tired, boredom, avoiding the staffer on a friday, more work, depression, tired, tired, tired, fucking miserable. 15 hour days were a minimum, 16-17 were normal, 20+ were frequent and once or twice a month there would be the dreaded all nighter. I worked around 2 out of every 4 weekends in some form. I was never free, I always had my blackberry with me, and thus I could never truly dettach myself from the job. These are the objective facts, contrary to what any 'baller' wants to tell you. The only models were excel models, the only bottles were coca cola, which I drank a lot of to stay awake.

Though I managed to maintain relationships with certain friends (testament to how good these friends were), I never was really 'there' and never really relaxed to enjoy their company, I was either pre-occupied, exhausted, or too self-centred to really have a 2 way conversation. I was constantly tired, constantly stressed, and I had this constant reoccurring thought. The thought went like this. I'm not happy. These are my golden years, my 20s, the years I want to look back on and talk about with fondness and pride. I should be making interesting stories, having the time of my life whilst I have no dependents. I'm richer than I've ever been, yet I'm not as happy as I was backpacking around South America on a shoestring. This is bullshit.

I personally did not find the work interesting, and that placed me in the 95% majority. Your not golfing with CEOs, talking about strategy, then driving your lambo home at 3.30pm to have sex with your hot girlfriend. No, your sat at your computer, haven't spent more than 5 minutes in the sun in weeks, your out of shape, bad skin, tired, overworked, and your facing yet another office dinner before calling yourself a cab somewhere between 1am and 5am to take your lonely ass to your empty bed. In those rare moments you do get out your tie to go talk to a client, you're not having a nice interesting chat with an interesting person, you talking finance to some other depressed office drone in some corporate office, who either pretends to give a shit or, more often than not, doesn't pretend. Of course, every now and then, I did meet that rare breed who got their kicks from debt-restructuring or endless levels of back-solved pseudoscientific analysis, but this only depressed me as it reminded me how little I cared about this nonsense, and thus made me further question why I was spending every waking moment - and half the ones I should have been asleep - devoted to it.

You're never going to get as rich as the superstars you admire on the TV and watch in films. Even though I got paid well, I wasn't going out buying a different coloured helicopters every weekend, rolling in designer threads, splashing £30k on a night out and holidaying every other week in some exotic location whenever I can be bothered to charter my private jet. You'll be above average, but still pretty average. Sure, you can buy an macbook air without really thinking about it, and you can take taxis instead of the bus. But that's it. I was amazed how modestly people lived in banking given all the hype that surrounds it. They were just sad middle class bland people, with unexciting lives, and unexciting prospects. A bunch of nerds who got caught up in a cage made of money and dreams and greed, and never got out. There had to be more to life than this.

Eventually, I thought fuck this. I got to the point where I wasn't buying myself nice things anymore because doing so only reinforced my dependency on a job which I hated, a job which was taking over every aspect of my shortening life. I had worked hard at university to have a good life, a happy life, a 'successful' life. And I wasn't finding it in IBD. And nobody above me was either. Even the 'baller' MDs were really just miserable, uninteresting, and often pathetic old farts. I didn't want to be them. I wanted to be a colourful, shinny person with love in my heart. Someone with passion, happiness, laughter lines, someone who has taken life by the horns and lived on the edge, taken risks, had love and loss and seen the world.

I made my plan to leave in baby steps. First I started interviewing at other city jobs - everything from hedge fund analyst to private equity analyst to inter dealer broker to insurance to wealth management to sales to trading and even equity research. These all looked boring, these all involved wasting away the majority of my life at a desk. These all involved long working hours, even if a little better. None of these lit the fire I once had before being crushed by banking. So I looked at jobs in corporates, in their M&A team, their finance team. Again, I went to a few interviews, got offers, but it was just the same shit. I didn't want to be a drone in a suit and tie. Fuck that Stephen, fuck that!

Eventually I snapped. Despite being staffed up to my eye balls, I left the office at 7pm to prepare for an interview I had the next morning at 8.30am. The AD I was working with (5 years my senior) consequently had to work until 5am. The next morning, I wasn't at my desk at 8am as I should have been. I was at my interview. Just another mind numbing 'opportunity' to work in debt refinancing team at Tesco's head office. Fuck that. I'd had enough. There was nothing for me in any spectrum of finance. I'd had enough. I walked into work at 11am, and by 11.01, the AD had dragged me into a side room to rip me a new asshole (she'd got a little cranky after 90 minutes sleep and a lot of stress). She said that she was going to go and talk to our team head about this and stood up. I told her to sit her ass down, I'd do it for her. I walked over to his desk, and I respectfully told him I'd had enough. I thanked him for his time, he did the same, we shook hands, and I packed my shit together and sent my bye bye email around the team.

Within 20 minutes of quitting, I was out of the front door. Bye bye blackberry, bye bye security pass, bye bye banking. The sun has never shone so bright, the air has never tasted so sweet, I have never felt lighter, than that moment. I was free. I was free. I was so fucking free I could taste it!

Now, oddly, I chose this moment to go to a shopping centre (long story) with a friend. Upon walking around in a slight state of shock I saw a piano in a suit shop, and this was exactly what I needed. To play a little tune and unwind. I didn't even ask if I could play, I just went in and started playing. A man quickly came up to me, paid me a compliment and then asked me what I did. I responded 'I'm a musician' (why not?!). He asked how much? I said £100 for 2 hours. He hired me 5 days a week. Just like that I'd become a musician, working around a ninth of the hours for about the same money.

Now I'm going to speed up the story a little. I quit this in a couple of weeks because I realised I didn't want to be a background musician in a shop, I wanted to be in the limelight. I wanted to entertain the world. I wanted to try and make it in music. I rolled a piano onto one of the busiest streets in London, and I started playing. Within 1 month I had 9 management contract offers and had started recording my first album. It's now been 6 months. I've travelled around the world, I've got an album on iTunes, named 'Butterfly In A Hurricane'. I've played to literally tens of thousands of people. I've felt all the love and beauty of the world. I've laughed until I've cried. I've enjoyed more female attention than I thought a guy with my face could get! This is the most alive I've ever felt.

I used to do something I hated all day everyday, I used to hate myself for doing that. I was bad company around people and nobody really liked me. Now I do something that I love, that makes me bubble with excitement daily. In return for doing the thing I love the most, people are made happy, people are overhwelmingly kind to me, people open their hearts to me, and I do the same to them. I roll my piano around the world sharing this love which grows inside in the soil of my happiness and fulfilment. I never ever thought I'd be this happy.

Okay, I can't afford the Prada suit right now, but I can't wait to wake up tomorrow, I've got a singing lesson in the morning and I'm meeting Coca Cola in the afternoon to talk about being in an advert for them. My future is unpredictable (which I love), but I know that it will be fine because I'm the one in control. I spent 23 years developing my brain, and now I'm using it.

I just wanted to reach out to all those people who are in banking and miserable but too scared to leave, I want to reach out to all the nerdy kids with the great CVs who want to go into banking, I want to reach out to everyone who has got this far reading and I'm telling you to take a leap and do something you love. You might not know what that is, but you sure as hell aren't going to find it sat unhappily at your desk trying to multitask all day long. You only progress by taking a leap of faith, not in God necessarily, but in yourself. Know that you have all the tools within you already. You can do and be whoever you want to be, and you deserve to be so much more than a tired suit in an office. Of course if that's where you get real happiness, then that's fantastic. I'm just saying that wasn't my experience, nor was it for the majority of those I met.

Life is short - you're young, you're old, you're dead. React to that knowledge. You have nothing to lose!

With all my love,
Stephen Ridley

In the interests of proof (and self promotion), here are the links to some YouTube videos and my Facebook/twitter.

www.facebook.com/stephenridley.official
https://twitter.com/ThisIsRidley

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1nnYgVPy7gA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1dkKOYmskE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A06V12zX1NQ

p.s. I've responded to a few people's comments etc. on this post http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/life-after-i...

and

http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/life-after-i...

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Tags:
  • Money
  • investment
  • power
  • prestige
  • the meaning of life
  • IBD
  • IB
  • Banking
  • bullshit
  • fulfilment
  • happiness
  • I-Banking Bullpen
AndyLouis's picture

thanks for sharing your story

AndyLouis
     
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 5,827
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:31pm

thanks for sharing your story Stephen

WSO's COO (Chief Operating Orangutan) | My story | Connect with me on Linkedin.

2013 WSO Conference

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Rupert Pupkin's picture

Cool story bro

Rupert Pupkin
      IB
 
 
(Senior Gorilla, 814
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:31pm

Cool story bro

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bfin's picture

This will be epic.

bfin
      CF
 
(Neanderthal, 2,772
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:31pm

This will be epic.

The answer to your question is 1) network 2) get involved 3) beef up your resume 4) repeat -happypantsmcgee

WSO is not your personal search function.

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D M's picture

interesting, thanks for

D M
      O
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 4,819
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:35pm

interesting, thanks for sharing

"WSO is like the 300 for anti spamage. None shall pass." -happypantsmcgee
"You stop being an asshole when it sucks to be you." -IlliniProgrammer

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M Friedman's picture

At a loss for words, but this

M Friedman
     
 
(King Kong, 1,007
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:41pm

At a loss for words, but this was epic in that it was well written and hit the spot. I guess I'll have to check out the album too.

See my WSO blogs here.

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D M's picture

I just read it again (well, I

D M
      O
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 4,819
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:44pm

I just read it again (well, I skimmed it the first time), and +1 for you man. I'm definitely checking out your pages to see what you got going on!

"WSO is like the 300 for anti spamage. None shall pass." -happypantsmcgee
"You stop being an asshole when it sucks to be you." -IlliniProgrammer

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OMS's picture

this thread is going to be

OMS
      PE
 
 
(King Kong, 1,886
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:46pm

this thread is going to be interesting. front page this andy!

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AndyLouis's picture

oldmansacks: this thread is

AndyLouis
     
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 5,827
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:53pm
oldmansacks:

this thread is going to be interesting. front page this andy!

got it

WSO's COO (Chief Operating Orangutan) | My story | Connect with me on Linkedin.

2013 WSO Conference

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Aero's picture

How did you keep your piano

Aero
      IB
 
(Senior Baboon, 224
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:55pm

How did you keep your piano skills sharp while working banking hours?

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Boreed's picture

Man, looking through this

Boreed
      PE
 
(Senior Gorilla, 952
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:57pm

Man, looking through this guys thread history you can see how banking basically wore him down progressively.

OP, best of luck to you. If I ever see you in concert I expect back stage VIP shiz and bishes, I'll say "WSO represent muddafucka!", and you'll tell security to let me through.

Aight? Respect.

WSO User Guidelines
WSO Interview Guides

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Febreeze's picture

Rupert Pupkin: Cool story

Febreeze
     
 
(King Kong, 1,151
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 7:56pm
Rupert Pupkin:

Cool story bro

nicely done

RIP WSO Chat.

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Human's picture

Congrats. Wish you the best

Human
      PE
 
 
(King Kong, 1,891
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:00pm

Congrats. Wish you the best in your endeavors.

"I am the hero of the story. I don't need to be saved."

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anonymousman's picture

Aero: How did you keep your

anonymousman
      IB
 
 
(Senior Gorilla, 789
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:00pm
Aero:

How did you keep your piano skills sharp while working banking hours?

Oddly enough the bank I worked at had a grand piano in the foyer (just for show), and I would used to play that every day, even if just one song, before jumping in the taxi home!

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ocho's picture

anonymousman: Aero: How did

ocho
     
 
(Monkey, 55
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:03pm
anonymousman:
Aero:

How did you keep your piano skills sharp while working banking hours?

Oddly enough the bank I worked at had a grand piano in the foyer (just for show), and I would used to play that every day, even if just one song, before jumping in the taxi home!

Really enjoyed your story... by the looks of your playing, I assume you play by ear (don't read write/music)? Looks like you found a way to use some natural talent! Good luck with this endeavor, I'll check out your album.

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Mammon's picture

Reminds me of the novel Bank

Mammon
      O
 
(Senior Monkey, 82
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:06pm

Reminds me of the novel Bank by David Bleden. Awesome story dude! I'd say that banking was necessary for you though, you needed the misery to drive you and the money to make it all happen.

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Funkfreed's picture

Congrats man, I'm glad you

Funkfreed
     
 
(Baboon, 147
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:07pm
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anonymousman's picture

Mammon: Reminds me of the

anonymousman
      IB
 
 
(Senior Gorilla, 789
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:11pm
  • 0
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Virginia Tech 4ever's picture

This is a great story, but I

Virginia Tech 4ever
      EN
 
 
(Neanderthal, 2,319
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:17pm
  • -6
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Bondarb's picture

Awesome story, congrats!

Bondarb
      HF
 
 
(Neanderthal, 2,284
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:15pm
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Virginia Tech 4ever's picture

Cool, nobody disputes what I

Virginia Tech 4ever
      EN
 
 
(Neanderthal, 2,319
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:27pm
  • -4
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formerBBbanker1254's picture

Virginia Tech 4ever: This is

formerBBbanker1254
     
 
(Senior Monkey, 81
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:28pm
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Virginia Tech 4ever's picture

formerBBbanker1254: Virgini

Virginia Tech 4ever
      EN
 
 
(Neanderthal, 2,319
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:32pm
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anonymousman's picture

Virginia Tech 4ever: This is

anonymousman
      IB
 
 
(Senior Gorilla, 789
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:34pm
  • -1
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kmzz's picture

so as a musician how many

kmzz
      O
 
(Senior Gorilla, 759
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:39pm
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Commuter's picture

IB4 Media

Commuter
      IB
 
 
(Neanderthal, 2,990
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:40pm

I work here...sup
WSO Company Database | WSO Job Board
[email protected]

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Warhead's picture

Virginia Tech 4ever: This is

Warhead
      IB
 
(Senior Baboon, 245
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:43pm
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Toronto's picture

Best career story I've read

Toronto
     
 
(Senior Baboon, 180
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:43pm
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Beachbum89's picture

OP you look like Tim Tebow in

Beachbum89
      IB
 
(Senior Monkey, 81
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:46pm
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Virginia Tech 4ever's picture

Warhead: Virginia Tech

Virginia Tech 4ever
      EN
 
 
(Neanderthal, 2,319
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:49pm
  • -2
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finger_me_elmo's picture

Commuter: IB4

finger_me_elmo
      PE
 
(Baboon, 129
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:48pm

Whats the matter? Scared of my little red fuzzy anus? Don't be shy,let me show you the way, give me your hand and I will take you to paradise <3

Kind Regards,

ElmElm

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SonnyCrockett's picture

anonymousman: I wanted

SonnyCrockett
      O
 
(Senior Monkey, 66
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:54pm
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Chocobo's picture

Absolute amazing story!

Chocobo
     
 
(Senior Baboon, 232
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:50pm
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Anacott_CEO's picture

Awesome story, man. Glad you

Anacott_CEO
      CF
 
(King Kong, 1,259
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:53pm
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zeropower's picture

Commuter: IB4 Media ^ This

zeropower
      ST
 
(Senior Orangutan, 486
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:53pm
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Boreed's picture

Moni: Absolute amazing story!

Boreed
      PE
 
(Senior Gorilla, 952
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:55pm

WSO User Guidelines
WSO Interview Guides

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AndyLouis's picture

zeropower: Commuter: IB4

AndyLouis
     
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 5,827
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:55pm

WSO's COO (Chief Operating Orangutan) | My story | Connect with me on Linkedin.

2013 WSO Conference

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BlackHat's picture

Anyone else ever wonder how

BlackHat
      HF
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 4,950
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:56pm

I hate victims who respect their executioners

Follow BH & Co. on Twitter: @DumbLuckCapital
twitter.com/DumbLuckCapital

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ASG10010's picture

love this...best of luck,

ASG10010
     
 
(Chimp, 3
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 8:57pm
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ThaVanBurenBoyz's picture

Need a drummer? In all

ThaVanBurenBoyz
      PE
 
 
(King Kong, 1,516
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:08pm
  • 0
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torontomonkey2's picture

Fantastic story. Wish I had

torontomonkey2
      IB
 
(Monkey, 49
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:01pm
  • 0
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go.with.the.flow's picture

I think i should pack my bags

go.with.the.flow
      EN
 
(King Kong, 1,109
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:02pm

|| But feeling good and enjoying life are prerequisites to success, not by products of it- Midas Mulligan Magoo ||

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JDawg's picture

Great story and very

JDawg
     
 
(Gorilla, 518
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:07pm
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gf1990's picture

Inspiring story. I'm glad you

gf1990
      PE
 
(Baboon, 125
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:11pm
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CompBanker's picture

Congratulations! Very glad

CompBanker
      PE
 
 
(Almost Human, 8,508
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:11pm

CompBanker

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Whiskey5's picture

Holy fuck. I am at a loss for

Whiskey5
      IB
 
(Gorilla, 705
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:12pm
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t_banker's picture

Congratulations, I am glad

t_banker
     
 
(Monkey, 38
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:14pm
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WSOusername's picture

Nice. Stories like this

WSOusername
     
 
(Senior Gorilla, 950
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:15pm

GBS

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anonymousman's picture

SonnyCrockett: anonymousman

anonymousman
      IB
 
 
(Senior Gorilla, 789
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:18pm
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anonymousman's picture

GoldmanBallSachs: Nice.

anonymousman
      IB
 
 
(Senior Gorilla, 789
 
Points)
 on 4/25/12 at 9:25pm
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Virginia Tech 4ever
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