Highest Ranked Comments In The Last Year

+30 I was asked if I was working part time when leaving at 1:30am so there's always worse Intern in IB-M&A
+30 I moved here because, well, I had to leave the States, but I picked Thailand because I always had a thing for Asian girls, you know? And when I got here, oh I was like kid in a candy store. Angus Macgyver
+30 The first word here is your answer  Intern in IB - Gen
+30 its scary when its really like 2-3Mds in that group, and 1 in consumer.    Those MDs leave and UBS is basically forced to divest the entire US americas franchise. Associate Director in IB - Gen
+30 Are you a woman?  VP in PE - LBOs
+30 Congrats on the offer Works at Deutsche Bank
+30 Affair with his wife is the real answer here  PM in HF - Event
+30 Not exactly sure how we got to the point of comparing UBS to magicians assistant. If I was a magician’s assistant I’d be pretty offended to being compared to UBS. thelegend272829
+30 Many groups you just need the group head to love you. He/she will pick their favorites and pay bad bonuses to non-favorites, regardless of how the group is performing Prospect in IB - Cov
+29 if you're a 7/10+ chick, you're good. If you're ugly or fat or a gay dude, just start FT recruiting Intern in PE - Other
+29 It's all a function of how much money you make. If you're a top .1% in a hedge fund, you make more money than any pro athlete. If you're a .1% in tech, you're likely worth hundreds of millions of dollars.  usernameladiesman217
+29 If true, this is disgusting behavior and an abuse of power… if the gender roles were reversed this would be on the front page of the WSJ.   Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+29 Karma for not answering my networking emails…. Sorry buddy have fun on the streets Associate 3 in Consulting
+29 Sir thank you for taking the time - I would like to know how many bathrooms are on the floor  Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
+29 FastNotSoFurious
+29 Congrats on UBS! Associate 1 in IB - Gen
+29 You can either 1) post this on a dump like reddit where you will get plenty of “amerika bad” sympathy points, or 2) invent a time machine and ask this question pre-1776 when we may have cared. VP in PE - LBOs
+29 Does FGLI mean fucking ugly? Associate 1 in PE - Other
+29 No more segregating people based on the color of their skin. Feels good man. brianplord
+29 Congrats on Guggenheim! [email protected]
+29 I think BoyWithRizzz recommends to avoid if you have any other option Gokagolover
+29 FBI is not even close to high test. You’re spending your days chasing another man who makes more money than you. Intern in IB - Gen
+29 First they took away the blockbuster deals And nobody said anything because we were “leaning into strategic dialogue” with the right clients Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+29 The strongest legal case would revolve around analyst misclassification under the Fair Labor Standards Act (29 U.S.C. §213(a)(1)). Summer Associate in IB - Cov
+29 I see quite a bit of hate on this one and feel obliged to tell some US folks to go fk themselves, respectfully.  FinnesseGod
+29 Ordering milk is fine — just don’t ask the alum if they’re ‘harboring any enemies of the state.’ That’s generally frowned upon in coffee chats. DealFlowDan
+29 agree god bless our beloved asians GS under Blankfein
+29 Ok but when can I say nigga in the workplace again? iercurenc
+29 DCM analysts are the only analysts who during networking calls mention downsides to their role without me asking Froggo
+28 Alternatively if your dad becomes part of the admin you can skip MD and become CEO before 30. VP in PE - Other
+28 Nah if you this slow you aint "good" Analyst 1 in PE - Other
+28 Can always count on MMPM for some boner response on literally every post Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+28 do not redeem  Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+28 If that’s the case, even ChatGPT knows you should stay away Prospect in IB - Gen
+28 No one is starting WWIII over Iran. Trump gives an address here in a half hour and will most likely just talk about the success of the strikes.  CRE
+28 Tadpole trying to give life advice over here lmao Analyst 1 in IB - CB
+28 I hear Wells Fargo Anchorage branch is looking for people just like you! Prospect in IB-M&A
+28 Did you do compliance training at all? Associate 2 in IB - Cov
+28 Deep rooted insecurity stephen4056
+28 Has anyone noticed that poker dealers are so unhelpful, they don’t even tell you what hands to play, all they do is turn the cards up. What value do they even add? midwest_analyst
+28 >”pivot, don’t pout” >”if it’s that bad, switch groups” What do you think he meant by “I don’t think I’ll stay the full two years?” am_5
+28 Dawg you work in corpfin in a T3 city, nobody is coming for your job😭😭 Analyst 1 in IB - Restr
+28 Ignore title, but just about to make it through my analyst years. A number of items as you have listed above worked for me. Made some internal rules that I followed. Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+28 Commented on this earlier, but my thoughts below as someone who's ex-UBS and left: Senior VP in CorpDev
+28 Okay you have a big dick bro, we get it Intern in IB - Gen
+28 Yes, you autist. Message him. Keep it cool. Associate 1 in IB - Gen
+28 Would love for a bank to have the balls to go to a jury trial. Jury would be insane in NYC and the jury would hand the analysts $1bn and derive that amount based on vibes alone Associate 2 in IB - Gen
+28 The Bible explicitly condemns usury. Today you'd interpret that word as meaning exorbitant interest, but back in the day the Catholic Church interpreted it to mean any sort of financing / interest. VP in PE - Growth
+28 Unions only start when/if there are large abuses of their employees. Could be the case too Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
+28 Intern in IB - Gen
+28 If you're going to cheat and you're already making good money, get a 21 year old Eastern European sugar baby from DUMBO House instead of a stressed out 7/10 MBA associate girl Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+28 you should do it when the group head is buying you drinks at happy hour… oh wait  Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
+28 I think too many people are jumping to the conclusion that headcount will be eliminated. Was it eliminated when the industry moved from paper to Excel? PEanon
+28 Congrats on PJT HomelessToast
+28 Woooooosh Associate 3 in CorpDev
+27 UBS just can't catch a break. I'm probably going to get crucified for this take but honestly though at a certain point we're going to need to close the books on this one. Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+27 Are you retarded? Gold-ManSacks
+27 If your VP hasn't acknowledged it yet, definitely get ahead of it by writing a handwritten note apologizing profusely for getting handsy with his fiance when you were drunk. That's your best bet.  ebitdurrrr
+27 Thread full of lazard analysts saying moe is done lol Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+27 right now there are two or three MDs that have more revenue than HC, RELL, Tech, M&T, FIG combined Associate Director in IB - Gen
+27 "I was knee deep drowning in wet pussy" These are the sentences that bring me back to this website. anonanonymous
+27 MDs would violate the Geneva conventions to get an extra million in fees  Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+27 Analyst 2 in IB - Cov
+27 Did 3 cases, 10+ interviews, was supposed to meet somebody from senior mgmt as the final round…and when I showed up at the office I was told something came up and the guy needed to reschedule. Associate 2 in ER
+27 What you see as false deadlines may be them building in lead time so that they can refine your work product before it gets to seniors M Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+27 “Associate hates me because I deprioritize their work…  how can I get them to stop hating me…?” are you retarded?   Works at Citigroup
+27 Please don't waste her time Tracer85
+27 first congratulations, you can update your username Intern in IB-M&A
+27 This reminds me of the time I accidentally ended up in bed with Jessica Alba. I too did not fully understand what I had gotten myself into, but like REPE, she was both gracious and exciting.  IsItREPE
+27 Congrats on UBS! Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+27 With the new capital rules coming, UBS IB is screwed long-term anyway. Analyst 3+ in IB - DCM
+27 God, mentioning M&Ms reminds me of my old MD who was obsessed with the smurfs. He had a huge jar of only blue M&Ms on his desk all the time. And how did he get this? VP in PE - LBOs
+27 A serious relationship? Miracle1111
+27 Guys, time to look at real estate not as a career path and industry and more of a skill set on asset intensity along with other skills you are developing. I said this during the better times and especially now.  odog @digitalimmortality.com
+27 This the level of delusion I aspire to have spudrmonke
+27 average Booth associate Intern in IB - Cov
+27 JPM Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
+27 You have a cap of 85k H-1B visas a year, in a country of 350 million people. Associate 2 in Consulting
+27 Nancy Pelosi Gold-ManSacks
+27 because there are smart people from other schools?  Coastee
+27 Watch the episode of the Soprano’s where Meadows boyfriend picks up the check then decide BigChimpin86
+27 OP tried to do a "top-tier BB (think GS/MS/JP/UBS)"  Research Analyst in ER
+27 The wealthy elite have made billions off the backs of abusing analysts. Over last decade tens dead (Mental health/Drugs/Stress), hundreds hospitalized, maybe thousands hospitalized. Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+26 Dm me with your work email, I’ll send you some slides I could use help with am_5
+26 This is a dumb comparison. Principal in PE - LBOs
+26 6 YOE in nyc. I worked with plenty of “H1Bs” and turns out they aren’t that different to you and me. Hungry to do well and wants to make money... cowleycrackheadd
+26 "Great to meet you. I'm looking at your resume, let's start by telling me why join our team over Evercore M&A?" barclayscalgarydemon
+26 60+ tabs sounds like a skill issue on your part. What are you trying to do model out how many times your residents flush the toilet. larry david
+26 congrats on making it to sixth sentence without letting every one know you go to Harvard! Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+26 Smoke Frog for resurrecting roles  Prospect in IB - Gen
+26 Congwats on Dodge & Cox Intern in IB - Restr
+26 It seems like this content is not included in my knowledge base. I'm sorry, but it looks like this may be out of my ability to answer... maybe some of the links below might help? WSO Monkey Bot
+26 No one gonna say it? The real reason London has gotten so much worse in recent years? Aight  analyzinganalyst
+26 Ah, the classic ‘merit’ line as if merit exists in a vacuum. The same target school pipelines, family connections, and unspoken preferences are somehow not ‘special treatment’? Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
+26 Congrats on meal stipend! Associate 1 in IB - Cov
+26 The gap between target and non-Target is the most interesting part of this. EllyEquity
+26 Your banks aura ranking is not the reason the 2/10 on Hinge isn't texting you back Gold-ManSacks
+26 Wouldn’t wish UBS on my enemies, not worth the pay, when you get surprise low bonuses and are wasting your time not closing deals with aimless networking Prospect in IB - Cov
+26 "Haha I hope Tel Aviv gets glassed and AIPAC stops buying our politicians" is the only right response bhguingyujh
+26 Retirement - sure, ok. The real underlying reason is that Canada is over. There are no actual businesses to even advise, which is why most "boutiques" are either business brokers or junior miner ECM merchants. Search Fund Enthusiast